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Calllaris

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Calllaris last won the day on July 20

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About Calllaris

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    Advanced Member

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  • Orientation
    Lesbian
  • Location
    Travelling
  • Interests
    Lawn tennis, arts, travel, fruits& vegetables, water and wine. Females, reserve, singles.
    Monogamy.
    Tuxedos, sports suits.
    Research writing.
    Document creating

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  • FlyJ

  • vina

  1. Written by Charles Uzor and originally published on fitnessnaija.com In a world of black and white people, grey people are taught to see themselves as abnormal, queer and mysterious. Grey people must choose to become black or white in order to earn acceptance in society. Barbara Bush, a former US First Lady once told the story of a young pastor who finds himself in charge of some really energetic children. He hits upon the game, Giants, Wizards, and Dwarfs. “You have to decide now,” the pastor tells the children, “which you are – a giant, a wizard, or a dwarf?” At that, a small girl tugging at the leg of the pastor’s trousers asks, “But where do the mermaids stand?” And the pastor tells her there are no mermaids. And she says, “Oh yes there are — they are. I am a mermaid.” The recent ban on transgender people joining the US military, and the declaration by a transgender activist that not only women bleed, has generated a furore around the world. Many are wondering what the world is turning into. Others are insisting that people deserve to be treated with dignity, no matter the appearance of their external sex organs. I will tell you a little story. Bashiru looked apparently healthy when he reported at the urology department at UNTH with a history of bleeding through the urethra. He started bleeding from the age of 10, and it was cyclical, just like menses in women. The bleeding usually lasted for *** days. He also had cyclical lower abdominal pain, which remained unexplained. He menstruated every *** months. Bashiru’s right testis was normal but there was a separate soft swelling that could be felt at its lower end. Doctors determined in the lab that he had translocation of X and Y chromosome 45(t X/Y). Ultrasound tests discovered was a distinct mass in the left half of the scrotum. Left testis was not seen. Surprisingly, a uterus (womb) was found to be present and normal in size and position. Fluid collection was noted in the cavity of the uterus. The ovaries were not seen at their usual location. His male and female hormone levels were in the normal range for a healthy man, except that another hormone, the FSH, was 4 times above the usual value in males. Bashiru’s semen analysis showed he lacked sperm yet the quantity of semen was normal. He was informed by his doctors that he was a true hermaphrodite. He was also informed that he could get sex reassignment surgery if he wanted. After discussing with his doctors, he decided he preferred to be male. Hence a surgical procedure called Total abdominal hysterectomy with right-sided salpingo-oophorectomy and left salpingectomy was performed under general anaesthesia. It entailed removal of his womb, ovaries and tubes, in an attempt to make his life more “normal” as a male. Think about it for a moment. If Bashiru chose not to seek medical care for his urological problems, he would have been a male only by choice, and not because he possessed the right genital equipment fit for men. He might have been ashamed to admit to his friends that he menstruated like a woman; he might have felt sad that he could not impregnate his girlfriend, yet in many other respects, he was a kind and responsible member of his community. Imagine the world going absolutely nuts, that Bashiru, an individual who publicly identified as male, had been reassigned female sex during that operation. Imagine the humiliation he would suffer every day, for being thought “unsure” of which gender he belonged to. His condition could hardly be called debilitating. In my short practice as a physician, I have seen women getting admitted into the hospital on monthly basis, as a result of serious menstrual problems. An employer that relied on the evidence of such hospital visits to deny a woman a job deserved to have his brain checked. Why then is it okay to mock and victimise people like Bashiru for identifying as Mermaids, rather than as Giants, Wizards and Dwarfs? Again, I ask you to think about it just for a moment.
  2. Originally published in independent.co.uk *This piece contains spoilers for Game of Thrones Season Seven, Episode Two* As it so often does, Sunday night’s Game of Thrones left me screaming at my television screen. Now in its seventh season, showrunners David Benioff and D B Weiss probably assume we’re used to the unpredictable horrors they routinely inflict on the denizens of Westeros. But Sunday night was different, and has me wondering whether I can stomach watching this show again. As they sailed for Dorne at Queen Daenerys’ behest, Yara Greyjoy and Ellaria Sand – two of the handful of LGBT characters the show has given us – begin flirting. It looks like the two are about to hook up when Euron Greyjoy (Yara’s brutal uncle and rival for the throne of the Iron Isles) attacks their fleet. Euron manages to kill most of their sailors and get a knife to Yara’s throat, but the episode leaves Yara’s and Ellaria’s fates unknown. They must survive. Game of Thrones is a brilliant show that has me and millions of other viewers on the edge of our seats week after week, but it has a horrible record of writing same-sex couples. The only other real same-sex couple was brought down way back in season two, when Renly Baratheon was killed by a shadow demon birthed from the womb of Melisandre. The symbolism of a vagina demon killing a gay man told gay audiences everything we needed to know – homosexuality leads heterosexual retribution. This became even more obvious when, at the end of last season, Renly’s partner Loras was arrested for “buggery” and put on trial by a far-right religious cult which demanded heterosexuality or death. In the end, that cult was blown to smithereens by Queen Cersei, but it was of little consolation as Loras was killed along with them. My problem isn’t so much that same-sex loving characters don’t get a happy ending on Game of Thrones. No one really does. But same-sex love is treated as a plot device on this show. None of the lesbian, gay, or bisexual characters we encounter are main characters. Instead, they are background players who, for the most part, serve to further the storylines of the main – and straight – characters. When same-sex love is shown, it is often portrayed as something decadent or weak – such as when Oberon’s bisexuality was considered as a Dornish eccentricity rather than a valid sexuality. He was shown to be a promiscuous dandy, but we didn’t see him form any meaningful relationships with men. His relationship with Ellaria was fleshed out, though. Of course, that was before he had his head smashed in. Yet another LGB character that meets a grizzly fate. This was a common trope in 20th century literature and television, where homosexuality was seen to lead to tragic ending. So taboo was showing same-sex love in a positive light that E.M. Forster held off on publishingMaurice until he was dead, afraid editors and the public wouldn’t accept it. But we don’t live in the 20th century, and gay and bisexual characters – and audiences – deserve better. Game of Thrones loves playing with gay and bisexual trauma as a plot device, but it doesn’t ever seem willing to actually let us be fully formed people with our own agencies and in charge of our own destinies. When two characters finally do find a little joy – such as Yara and Ellaria sharing a kiss – they are immediately attacked or killed. We never get to see what might have been. Which is why I’m rooting for Ellaria and Yara to survive. I don’t know what’s going to happen to them, but I hope it ends with them ruling Dorne and the Iron Isles as coregents. I’ll settle for them actually becoming fully formed, dynamic characters who serve as more than a plot device in Daenerys’ quest for the Iron Throne.
  3. Would you..?

    No. I've found I wont ever be able to, this with a stranger.
  4. How to prevent food poisoning

    "Left over onions are poisonous. When food poisoning is reported, the first thing the officials look for is when the 'victim' last ate onions and where those onions came from (in the potato salad?). It's probably the onions, and if not the onions, it's the potatoes." More coming..
  5. what happened here

    Thoughtful
  6. Originally published on Bellanaija.com, the following write-up penned by Harold Writes and titled Feminism, Homosexuality & Having a Strong Voice, was a topic I jumped unto as soon as I saw it, believing it'd show support and solidarity for the LGBT community. In its centre, I began to relate it to another article I' d read here few days ago, thinking it was leading me a place where we judge because we dont understand and vice versa. But... I finished reading, seeing more biased and with every opposite feeling from my initial. And...Well I'll just allow you make your own opinion of this entire thing. * There is a saying that, just as our palmar flexion creases are different, so are we all different from each other. Different faces, backgrounds, experiences, mindsets, beliefs and voices. No two people are the same. Globalisation and civilisation has tried to bridge the gap between our differences. What used to be unique and special to an individual or a certain group of people, has now assumed a status of global awareness and in some instances, global acceptance. Foreign cultures, ideas and beliefs are now being shared across the world and some have slowly seeped into the consciousness of the locals. It is no longer an “Us vs. Them” situation. The world is now a global village. We all now have common knowledge, understanding and acceptance about certain things. Concepts which were once foreign and strange, are no longer so. Concepts like democracy, artificial baby womb, climate change, surrogacy, feminism, LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender)… The last two mentioned concepts – feminism and LGBT – are current topical issues, especially in Nigeria. We, as a people, have not completely accepted them as a way of life. I think they will continue to occupy the debates fora for a very long time. And this is where your voice is important. I have my opinion on each of the topics and I have written several articles on them, especially modern day feminism and homosexuality (I know LGBT is a larger “family”). As for feminism, I have nothing against equality between the sexes. I have constantly expressed my views on the original tenets of the concept and the modern day adaptation and actualisation of same. I have called for more robust movements like humanism and equalism etc. I do not attempt to recap all my thoughts on the topic here, but if I must highlight why concepts like humanism and equalism should be better considered and why modern day feminism is faulty, just take a look at modern trends in the human sexuality. We no longer have just male and female genders anymore. We now have cisgenders, transgenders, neuter-genders, non-binary genders and other non-traditional genders in the world. If feminism is a concept that promotes equality amongst men and women, whither lays the fate of, and equality for the other genders? And by the way, what the (insert explicit word here) is a cisgender, neuter-gender and non-binary gender? At what point will modern day civilisation draw the line? This is why your voice is important. Let the world know where you stand. I know it is becoming increasingly difficult to pitch your tent with one camp when faced with strong topics like the foregoing. But you have to, for the sanity and advancement of humanity. We need these conversations. Once upon a time, colonialism was legitimate until people started speaking out. And it was abolished. In the same vein, once upon a time, people tried to sabotage and belittle the woman and her role in the society until feminism emerged and spoke. Today, feminism has attained global acceptance, liberated the society in general and the women folk in particular and has even fostered other discussions like humanism and equalism. Talking about having a strong voice, I have never been a supporter of homosexuality – the aspect where two people of same gender make love and have sexual intercourse. But it seems everywhere I turn to, the world is trying to shove it down my throat to accept it as normal. Almost every movie or series on TV nowadays has a homosexual love story in it. Some go as far as broadcasting the make out session. Today, the angle of homosexuality which is been packaged and sold is “love conquers all”… “let people love who they want to love”. The love angle. You can hardly fault that. Love is actually a beautiful thing and you cannot blame anyone for falling in love. For even God Himself, so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son… Fine. Let love be. But no matter how beautiful the story of homosexuality is portrayed, I will never condone or accept as normal, the act of two same gender people having sex. But guess what again? The fact that, I do not condone the sexual act itself, does not translate to me wishing death, hurt or hate on a homosexual. No, no, no. Homosexuals are humans with flesh and blood like you and I. They were created by the same God that created you and I. If they choose to do what I consider as gross, that is my cup of tea, as much as it is theirs. It would not stop me from treating them any less of a human. What I do not condone is the attempt to make me accept the sexual act itself as normal. My life experiences and upbringing have wired me to believe the act is not normal. The only type of love-making I have been exposed to, is the one between a man and a woman. My voice is important too. I can love, treat and relate with homosexuals as fellow humans without necessarily condoning or accepting their type of sexual activity. We should be able to condemn those who want to see homosexuals dead or hurt. Let them understand it is not their duty to take the life of another just because they disagree with their manner of love-making. We should also speak with homosexuals. Make them understand it is not okay for them to want to force their sexual preferences/choices on another. This is the essence of conversations. There are several other topics engulfing the world right now. Topics like artificial baby wombs, capital punishment, right of self determination etc. Do not be silent. Participate in these conversations. Help shape the world. Be civil in your contribution. And most importantly, do not betray your voice in a world that is constantly trying to drown you. Be heard.
  7. Hey. Must I visit my profile to post a status update or is there a thread to see my updates? The 'edit post' button on posts and replies,I havent seen either. Danke

    1. FlyJ

      FlyJ

      Hey Callla,

      To update/view your status, you would need to go to your profile.

      Status updates/forum activities- Go to the unread content tab, click on all activity.

      Edit button - At the bottom of every post, there is a quote + edit button. 

      Bitte schone

    2. Bearluv
    3. FlyJ

      FlyJ

      Haha that's so cute @Bearluv

  8. What Are You Listening To At The Moment?

    The album is a treasure. Enya still hybernating?
  9. This is good! Now I know who you are. 😃You cant hide no more. I do not care for you, I wonder why you stalking. Creep.

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Calllaris

      Calllaris

      Better be strolling past. Two can play that game

    3. Calllaris

      Calllaris

      Or better still, share ur findings and be gone. My gf (yes, the one you just read about) wont want you hoverin. Yes be shocked, shes still the one!!

      On bed

      One love

      One girl

      Love wins, I always win

       

    4. Calllaris
  10. How do I get@ status updates

  11. Hot Topic - Gifts

    An valuable jewelry that belonged in her family.
  12. Some cute names exposèè here, Sexybumy. Haha, what do I know.

  13. Where is my profile?

    #innovativeinnovations

    1. sweetlady

      sweetlady

      What are you looking for?

    2. Calllaris

      Calllaris

      Status updates.

  14. Are we like we and our gf's are naked now?, like being watched? Bathing outside?

    #innovativeinnovations

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