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''Being #gay is an honor and a beautiful life #jesus never condemn gay people in the new testament so if you a good christian you wont too or can a servant be greater than his master. Criticize your G.O for having private jet when millions of his #church members are poor and unemployed, criticize them for collecting tithe during covid19'' Source

There are 27 figures of speech in the picture, can you guess one?

There is a huge chasm between African-Americans and African immigrants in the United States. That chasm has widened over the years. It has caused deep animosity between many African-Americans and their African immigrant cousins. The chasm has prevented African-Americans from participating in the current economic boom in Africa and it has shut many African immigrants out of opportunities for economic advancement here in the United States. The problem stems from deep misconceptions, sometimes fueled by the U.S. media. Astonishingly, many African-Americans believe that Africans are backward and primitive. Some make crude jokes about Africans or do not acknowledge the great contribution Africa has made to the world. For their part, many African immigrants buy into the erroneous notion that African-Americans are lazy and violent. They do not appreciate the great sacrifice African-Americans made, through advocating for their civil rights, to lay the foundation for Africans to be able to come to the United States and live in a country where both blacks and whites have equal rights, at least in theory if not always in practice. The different experiences of the two groups To understand the deep division that exists between African Americans and Africans, one first has to examine the background of the two groups. Before migrating to the United States, most Africans have typically dealt with white Americans who went to Africa as Peace Corps volunteers, missionaries, doctors or teachers. These Americans acted as mentors and guardians to the Africans and developed positive relationships with them. When they come to the United States, it has been my experience that Africans can easily identify with white Americans because they understand each other. Before migrating to the United States, the majority of Africans have had little to no direct negative experiences with whites. They simply do not hate them. On the other hand, most African-Americans grew up in black neighborhoods where they learned from older generations the history of slavery and the cruelty it inflicted on the black race. Furthermore, they have usually experienced firsthand and in their communities the legacies of racism that still exist in the United States. With this background, many African-Americans are not generally predisposed to trust white Americans, and they look down on those African immigrants who express respect or admiration for white Americans. How they react to racism and discrimination A fundamental difference between African Americans and African immigrants is the way they react to racism and discrimination. African Americans usually see racism as the main cause of poverty among their people. They are also quick to point out instances of perceived racism, even in circumstances where it is ambiguous, unclear or more complex than simple racial bigotry or discrimination. A classic example is the currently large African-American population in prison. Most African-Americans feel that the only reason there are so many African Americans incarcerated is their race. They blame police discrimination and lawmakers who make laws weighted to punish blacks. For Africans, after suffering many years in civil wars, military coups and other problems, they are happy to be in a country that offers them freedom. They are ready to integrate into the American culture without getting involved in the lingering racial conflicts. They do not typically get involved in the ongoing civil rights struggle – and that has angered many African-Americans. How they react to adversity Perhaps the greatest difference I have seen between African immigrants and African-Americans is how they react to adversity. Most African immigrants to the United States came here for economic advancement. They do not have any political agenda. They are willing to take any job and do not blame the “system” when they fail in their endeavors. Most African immigrants to the United States often live in mixed neighborhoods instead of black neighborhoods and they easily integrate. African immigrants know who they are. They are not easily offended when someone tries to put them down. They know where they come from and why they are here. For African-Americans, there is often a tendency to blame slavery for most of the problems they face today. For instance, when African American students fail in school, some educators blame slavery and do not look for other factors. However, the time has come for African Americans to realize that while racism still persists, the best thing they can do for their children is to teach them to take full responsibility for their actions. Fathers need to take care of their children and young women need to stay in school instead of having children. It is only when black people, be they from Africa or America, unite to instill discipline and respect for each other that the chasm that has divided us will narrow. Then we can finally work together to remove poverty from our people both here in the United States and Africa. Source

Copied online* You’re out at a social event with your girlfriend and all of a sudden a female comes up to her and introduce herself. She continues to talk to your GF while completely ignoring that you’re there. The conversation switched to flirtation and you’re getting annoyed by the second. Meanwhile your GF hasn’t stopped the conversation or let her know who you are. The conversation started to come to an end, and she asked your GF could they exchange numbers. When she said it, your GF looked at you. At that moment, what would you say?

Earlier this evening, it was announced via a joint statement that Lena Waithe and wife Alana Mayo split after just two months since announcing their marriage. While their split seemed sudden to most, sources exclusively tell lovebscott.com that their relationship was on the rocks even before they tied the knot. As you recall, back in August 2019, Lena and Alana got married in San Francisco. “We didn’t make any announcements or a big… We went to San Francisco. We went to the courthouse,” Lena explained at the time. “Got married right in front of [late gay rights activist and politician] Harvey Milk’s bust.” “[It was] her idea, as all good things are,” she continued. “And she was just driving and she saw the courthouse and she said, ‘We should get married there.’ And I said, ‘Cool, I’m down.'” Well, according to our sources — the quickie wedding came after multiple instances of Lena’s infidelity. Lena went along with it as a way to placate Alana and salvage their relationship. Despite their official union, Lena’s alleged cheating continued. “Even after they married, Lena was still buying designer gifts — Chanel, Gucci — for other women.” Yikes. We’ll just say this — to end a marriage within two months of making it public after being together for three years, Alana someone had to have been completely fed up. Source

The Church of England has stated that sex belongs only within heterosexual marriage, and that sex in gay or straight civil partnerships “falls short of God’s purpose for human beings”. Bishops have issued pastoral guidance in response to the recent introduction to mixed-sex civil partnerships, which says: “For Christians, marriage – that is, the lifelong union between a man and a woman, contracted with the making of vows – remains the proper context for sexual activity.” The church “seeks to uphold that standard” in its approach to civil partnerships, and “to affirm the value of committed, sexually abstinent friendships” within such partnerships. It adds: “Sexual relationships outside heterosexual marriage are regarded as falling short of God’s purpose for human beings.” The affirmation of traditional teaching at a time when the church is undergoing a major review of sexuality and marriage will delight conservatives. The Civil Partnership Act came into force in December 2005, allowing same-sex couples to acquire a legal status and rights in relation to property, inheritance and tax entitlement. In 2013, same-sex marriage was legalised. The C of E does not permit same-sex marriage. It allows clergy to be in same-sex civil partnerships as long as they are sexually abstinent. After the supreme court ruled in 2018 that mixed-sex couples should also have the right to a civil partnership, the law was amended. The first mixed-sex civil partnerships were registered last month. The Rev Dr Malcolm Brown, the C of E’s director of mission and public affairs, said: “Civil partnership is not the same as marriage, which is founded on the taking of solemn public vows and is recognised in the church’s teaching as the only proper context for sexual relationships. “So, as with same-sex civil partnerships, there is no formal service or blessing but clergy will, as always, be encouraged to respond pastorally to couples wishing to formalise their relationship in this way.” This week the C of E House of Bishops issued a new pastoral statement on civil partnerships, restating traditional teaching on sex and marriage. The bishops say that, unlike traditional marriage vows, the legislation on civil partnerships “leaves entirely open the nature of the commitment that members of a couple choose to make to each other when forming a civil partnership. In particular, it is not predicated on the intention to engage in a sexual relationship. “Because of the ambiguity about the place of sexual activity within civil partnerships of both sorts, and the church’s teaching that marriage between a man and a woman is the proper context for sexual intercourse, we do not believe it is possible for the church unconditionally to accept civil partnerships as unequivocally reflecting the teaching of the church.” C of E clergy “should not provide services of blessing for those who register a civil partnership”. The church has been racked by divisions for decades on what it says about and how it deals with LGBT issues. It has embarked on a large study of human sexuality, Living in Love and Faith, which is due to be completed this year. Many LGBT people within the church say they have been made to feel unwelcome, and activists have campaigned for the church to allow same-sex marriage and bless same-sex civil partnerships. Many observers have attributed the church’s stark decline among young people to its stance on LGBT issues. Conservatives in the church are likely to be heartened by the bishops’ statement, which concludes: “The church’s teaching on sexual ethics remains unchanged.” While upholding its position that marriage is a lifelong union between a man and woman, the bishops say the church seeks to “minister sensitively and pastorally to those Christians who conscientiously decide to order their lives differently”. Jayne Ozanne, a campaigner for LGBT rights and a member of the C of E’s ruling body, the General Synod, said: “I’m sadly unsurprised by the content of this statement but I’m deeply saddened by its tone. “It will appear far from ‘pastoral’ to those it discusses and shows little evidence of the ‘radical new Christian inclusion’ that we have been promised. I look forward to the day when the C of E sets its house in order, extends a proper welcome to all and makes confused ‘pastoral statements’ like this redundant.” Linda Woodhead, a professor in the department of politics, philosophy and religion at Lancaster University, said: “The C of E is unable to get over its fixation on homosexuality, which is driving the the national church into a position more like a fundamentalist sect and does not speak to the vast majority of younger people today.” Source

Nigerian gay rights activist Pamela Adie has revealed she was once a side chic to a guy. According to Pamela who, years before she came out as a lesbian, she was the side chic to a guy who is now married with kids to the main chick. In her words: ”On another note, when I thought I was straight, I was a side-chick to one guy back in college. Sometimes the main chic would call right after we just finished nacking and he’d be telling her how much he loved her…lol. It was funny sha. They’re married now…with kids.” Source

Orlando Pride and U.S. Women’s National Team goalkeeper Ashlyn Harris and defender Ali Krieger are one of sport’s most beloved couples. They first met in 2010 at USWNT training camp, where they became fast friends. “I just found her to be so captivating and always wanted to be around her,” Ali says. “She’s someone who seemed so confident and comfortable with herself, and I was so attracted to that.” The two began a romantic relationship, which they kept secret for a long time out of fear of losing endorsement deals, despite the fact that hardcore soccer fans suspected they were a couple long before they ultimately decided to go public. After almost 10 years of dating, they tied the knot over the holidays in a wedding that was a non-stop, weekend-long party and served as a reunion for many of the USWNT team members. It also capped off a World Cup winning season in which these athletes made front-page headlines for their powerful stances off the field as well as their talent on it. Ashlyn and Ali’s official move toward marriage started when Ashlyn asked Ali to marry her in Clearwater, Florida. They were enjoying a weekend away after a long season. Just before dinner, “we headed down to the beach to watch the sunset and take in the beautiful scenery,” Ali remembers. “We had a glass of champagne and then wanted to take photos to capture the moment. I proceeded to take a selfie and Ashlyn’s arm was in the back of the photo. I asked her to put it down and stop being silly, only to realize she had actually been holding the engagement ring the entire time I had been snapping photos. She pulled it around in front of me, and then asked the big question! I was in shock but so happy and excited at the same time. It was an incredible sunset, and just a perfect moment.” Wedding planning kicked off soon after. From the start, the goal was to create a classic, clean environment. “Vizcaya Museum and Gardens [in Miami] is this kind of Mediterranean Castle-like vibe right on the water,” Ali says. “It has this European feel that we were going for, so right when we walked into the venue for the first time, we were like, ‘Oh my God! It’s breathtaking. This is it!’” The couple worked with Sara Lowell from Sara Renee Events to bring their vision to life. “She’s so badass and beautiful and just absolutely crushed it for us,” Ali says. “We’re so grateful for her and her incredible team of fantastic people working to make our dreams a reality.” “Ali and I really wanted to align ourselves with people and brands that spoke to our soul and were really about nonconforming and understood the same vision we were going for,” Ashlyn adds. “I just wanted to feel like we could fully express ourselves, our sexuality, and our community.” To that end, Ashlyn wore Thom Browne, the designer she turns to for all of her red carpet events, and a TAG Heuer Monaco watch. Thom Browne dresses the Barcelona soccer team, which is how Ashlyn first became acquainted with the brand. “Honestly, I love that it’s all very gender neutral, very fluid, there are women in dresses and men in dress, and men and women in skirts. I can really feel how he expresses himself through clothes. It’s just so nonconforming and so far out. I’ve been wearing his stuff ever since.” She and the Thom Browne team created a custom tuxedo with a beaded argyle pattern for the wedding day. Like a lot of brides on the hunt for the right dress, Ali took a weekend trip to New York City with her best friend and maid of honor, Elizabeth Mumley, to search for her wedding gown. They found a Pronovias fit and flare dress with long sleeves and a V in the back that was exactly what she wanted. “I tried it on, and I knew it was the one!” she says of the “Helio” gown. “I fell in love and knew I would get married in this dress. It’s simple but sophisticated and elegant at the same time. I have personally always loved Pronovias. It’s a brand with which I think I share a lot of values as they believe in inclusivity and diversity.” On Saturday, December 28, just three days after Christmas, the couple married in the round so that friends and family could see the ceremony and feel part of it. “We wanted simple white flowers and a rose-petal-strewn aisle,” Ali says. “We also wanted to walk ourselves down the aisle as strong, confident, independent women. We felt like it was right.” Ashlyn’s best friend, USWNT team captain and the World Cup’s MVP, Megan Rapinoe, served as maid of honor; Ali’s brother, Kyle Krieger, was best man; and Orlando Pride player Sydney Leroux was the officiant. For the reception afterward, guests found their seats at tables named after LGBTQ icons including Marsha P. Johnson—a pioneering activist known for her role in the Stonewall uprising—and Anderson Cooper. Dena Lowell Blauschild and The Cook and the Cork catered a colorful menu with an incredible attention to detail. And just before the party really got started, Ali changed into the Condesa dress, also by Pronovias. “I wanted to make it into a mini dress but keep the train, so I customized the hem to give it a high-low effect,” she says. “It was very nice to be able to dance without worrying!” Meanwhile, Ashlyn seemed to strip off components of her wedding ensemble as the night went on—her pants were switched out for shorts and her tuxedo jacket was traded in for a sleeveless shirt and vest, also by Thom Browne, which allowed her to dance more freely. The newlyweds cut their rainbow cake and did their first dance to a live, acoustic version of Kina Grannis’s “Stand by Me.” Toasts were given over the course of the evening, with Ali’s brother Kyle voicing the sentiments so many there (and those taking in the festivities from afar via Instagram) were feeling: “Since you went public with your relationship, it has been a gift to watch you grow together. It’s amazing because you guys are like a beacon of light for all young queer LGBTQ women and men who just need someone to look up to, like we get happy endings too. In the media and the movies, so often...you know, queer stories have a devastating ending, but not here. In real life, we get to see you guys live the dream.” Source

Honey has been reported to have an inhibitory effect on around 60 species of bacteria, some species of fungi and viruses The benefits are explained below: Healthy sweetener: It can be used as a substitute for sugar in many foods and drinks. It contains about 69 per cent glucose and fructose, enabling it to be used as a sweetener which is far better for one’s overall health than normal white sugar. Weight loss: Though it has more calories than sugar, honey helps in digesting the fat stored in one’s body. Similarly, honey with lemon juice or cinnamon helps in reducing weight. Provides relief for cough: In 2012, a research was conducted on 300 children of age one to five years to find out the effect of honey on nocturnal cough and sleep quality. The results published in the Pediatrics Journals showed that honey could be a preferable treatment for a cough and sleep difficulty associated with childhood upper respiratory tract infections. Boosts energy: According to the USDA, honey contains about 64 calories per tablespoon ; therefore, it is used by many people as a source of energy. Furthermore, the carbohydrates in it can be easily converted into glucose since it is simple for the body to digest this pure and natural substance. Improves performance: Research has shown that honey is effective in boosting an athlete’s performance. It is a great way to maintain blood sugar levels, recuperate muscles, and restore glycogen after a workout. Improves memory: Honey contains polyphenols that can significantly improve the memory-related functions of the brain. It counters deficits in recall functions and induces memory formation at the molecular level. It is this modulation of neural circuitry that helps in improving memory. Research on Tualang honey, multi-floral honey found in Malaysia, showed that its intake improves the brain morphology to improve various learning and memory functions. Rich in vitamins and minerals: It contains a variety of vitamins and minerals. The type of vitamins, minerals and their quantity depend on the type of flowers used for apiculture. Commonly, honey contains vitamin C, calcium, and iron. Antiseptic property: It has anti-bacterial and anti-fungal properties, so it is often used as a natural antiseptic in traditional medicines. In-vitro tests on different medical-grade honeys showed potent bactericidal activity even in the presence of antibiotic-resistant bacteria that cause life-threatening infections in humans. However, the antimicrobial activity depends on the source of nectar. Antioxidant properties: It contains nutraceuticals highly effective for the removal of free radicals from the body. As a result, one’s body immunity is improved against many chronic health conditions. A study on the antioxidant properties of honey, published in the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry, attributed these qualities to the presence of a wide range of compounds, which include phenolics, peptides, Maillard reaction products, organic acids, enzymes, and other minor components. Anticancer properties: A review published in the journal Evidence-Based Complementary and Alternative Medicine found that there is growing evidence of honey’s anticancer potential. This is displayed by its antiproliferative, apoptosis, antimutagenic and anti-inflammatory properties. However, the floral source also decides its properties. Another article published in the same journal pointed out that as a natural substance, honey is a sustainable and low-cost option in cancer care in developing nations. Skin and hair care: Milk and honey are often served together since both of these ingredients help in creating smooth, beautiful skin. Consuming this combination every morning is a common practice in many countries for this reason. A study published in the European Journal of Medical Research investigated and confirmed the use of honey for dandruff and dermatitis. It said that crude honey could markedly improve seborrheic dermatitis, its associated hair loss and prevent relapse when applied weekly. Speeds wound healing: Significant research is being carried out to study its benefits in the treatment of wounds. These have been listed below: honey possesses antimicrobial properties, helps in promoting autolytic debridement and deodorises malodorous wounds. It also speeds up the healing process by stimulating wound tissues and helps in initiating the healing process in dormant wounds. These healing powers are not overstated. The Waikato Honey Research Unit provides details about the worldwide research being carried out on the benefits of honey in medicine. According to a British Broadcasting Corporation report ; doctors at the Christie Hospital in Didsbury, Manchester are planning to use it for faster recovery of cancer patients after surgery. Such research will provide scientific evidence for the beliefs held by honey lovers all over the world and will help in propagating the benefits to more people. The Russians used honey in World War I to prevent wound infection and to accelerate wound healing. The Germans combined cod liver oil and honey to treat ulcers, burns, fistulas and boils . Nearly all types of wounds like abrasion, abscess, amputation, bed sores /decubitus ulcers, burns, chill blains, burst abdominal wound, cracked nipples, fistulas, diabetic, malignant, leprosy, traumatic, cervical, varicose and sickle cell ulcers, septic wounds, surgical wound or wounds of abdominal wall and perineum are found to be responsive to honey therapy. Application of honey as wound dressing leads to stimulation of healing process and rapidly clears the infection. Honey has cleansing action on wounds, stimulates tissue regeneration and reduces inflammation. Honey impregnated pads act as non-adhesive tissue dressing . Opthalmology and honey Honey is used worldwide for the treatment of various ophthalmological conditions like blepharitis, keratitis, conjunctivitis, corneal injuries, chemical and thermal burns to the eyes . In one study, with topical application of honey as ointment, in 102 patients with non responsive eye disorders, improvement was seen in 85 per cent patients and in the remaining 15 per cent there was no disease progression. Application of honey in infective conjunctivitis reduced redness, swelling, pus discharge and time to bacterial eradication. Helps for digestive issues Honey is sometimes used to treat digestive issues such as diarrhoea, though there is not much research to show that it works. It is proven to be effective as a treatment for Helicobacter pylori (H. pylori) bacteria, a common cause of stomach ulcers. It is also a potent prebiotic. Prebiotics are a special form of dietary fiber that acts as a fertiliser for the good bacteria in your gut. Soothes sore throat Have a cold? Try a spoonful of honey. Honey is an old sore throat remedy. Add it to hot tea with lemon when a cold virus hits you. It also works as a cough suppressant. Research has suggested that honey is as effective as dextromethorphan, a common ingredient in over-the-counter cough medication. Just take one or two teaspoonfuls of honey straight. Antiviral effect of honey In addition to antibacterial and antifungal effects, natural honey has showed antiviral effect. Al-Waili (2004) investigated the effect of the topical application of honey on recurrent attacks of herpes lesions and concluded that topical honey application was safe and effective in the management of the signs and symptoms of recurrent lesions from labial and genital herpes compared to acyclovir cream. Honey has also been reported to have inhibitory effects on rubella virus activity . Prevents acid reflux Research has shown that honey can reduce the upward flow of stomach acid and undigested food by lining the esophagus and stomach. This has helped to reduce the risk of gastroesophageal reflux disease. GERD can cause inflammation, acid reflux, and heartburn. Now that you know the benefits of honey, how do you eat it? You can eat it raw, add it to water or different beverages, and you can also add it to several recipes. Honey is natural and considered harmless for adults. But pediatricians strongly caution against feeding honey to children under one year old.This is because of the risk of botulism. The spores of the botulism bacteria are found in dust and soil that may make their way into honey. According to Jatinder Bhatia , MD , a Georgia neonatologist who heads the American Academy of Pediatrics’ Committee on Nutrition, infants do not have a developed immune system to defend against infection. For diabetics, they should consult their doctors before including honey in their diets. The major problem is how to get pure honey; most of the honey you find in grocery stores are pasteurised. Many of the beneficial nutrients are destroyed in the process. If you are interested in trying raw honey, buy it from a trusted local producer. Source

Many Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer [LGBTQ] Nigerians choose to remain in the closet mostly because of homophobia and the fear of rejection. However, some get tired of hiding their sexuality and decide to come out to family and friends. But often, many face rejection; while a few are lucky to have supportive families. But Bryan could be considered as one of the brave ones who choose to live their true and authentic life regardless of the possible negative outcome. In a recent chat conversation on Whatsapp, Bryan, a Lagos-based Nigerian youth decided to open up to his brother about his sexuality but was shocked at the response that he received. Source

Interesting question I found online, and thought to share with the community. Can someone be everything you want and still turn you off?

A friend sent this to me, and it got me cracking up, so I thought to share. What are your thoughts?

The Emir of Gwandu and the Chairman Kebbi Council of Chiefs, Alhaji Muhammadu Bashar, has attributed the current security challenges in the country to the way in which Nigerians have been ignoring God’s commands and adopting satanic behaviours. The Emir said such satanic behaviours include rampant homosexuality, rape and lesbianism, which were causative factors of insecurity in the country. The monarch made the observation while addressing his subjects after Eid-el-Kabir prayer in Birnin Kebbi on Sunday. “The society today is bedevilled by cases of rape, homosexuality, lesbianism, kidnapping and rampant killings which resulted into the present insecurity Nigeria is faced with,” he said. He charged the general public, especially parents to instill discipline and respect in their children by giving them sound education. “I give glory to God for giving us the opportunity to witness another Sallah. “The present ills in our society is also due to indiscipline and too much love for material wealth,” he said. Bashar warned that unless the people fear to sin against God and parents remain committed to imbibing good family values, the country would continue to face instability. The Emir also called on the people to be compassionate and supportive to the needy, saying that those who were able to sacrifice animals during the Eid should endeavour to share the meet with the poor and other needy persons. He prayed to Allah to continue to bless the country and give leaders the wisdom to better the lives of people. In his Sallah message, Gov. Atiku Bagudu of Kebbi, prayed for peaceful return of pilgrims from Saudi Arabia. Bagudu appealed to communities living along flood prone areas across the state to relocate to upper areas in order to avoid being affected by flood. He thanked President Muhammadu Buhari for assenting to the bill converting College of Agriculture, Zuru to the status of a University. (NAN). Source

A friend of mine said : "Most Nigerian girls are boring in bed, and they have no imagination. All they do is lay down or finger. They can't kiss, eat pussy, or fuck properly. They are allergic to foreplay, and sexual playfulness. Fucking with them is an exercise in patience." What are your thoughts?

Novelist, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, who has lived in Lagos on and off for a decade has written an essay for Esquire's new Travel & Adventure issue, in which she reflected on life in Nigeria's biggest city, Lagos. Read below: Lagos will not court you. It is a city that is what it is. I have lived part-time in Lagos for 10 years and I complain about it each time I return from my home in the US — its allergy to order, its stultifying traffic, its power cuts. I like, though, that nothing about Lagos was crafted for the tourist, nothing done to appeal to the visitor. Tourism has its uses, but it can mangle a city, especially a developing city, and flatten it into a permanent shape of service: the city’s default becomes a simpering bow, and its people turn the greyest parts of themselves into colourful props. In this sense, Lagos has a certain authenticity because it is indifferent to ingratiating itself; it will treat your love with an embrace, and your hate with a shrug. What you see in Lagos is what Lagos truly is. And what do you see? A city in a state of shifting impermanence. A place still becoming. In newer Lagos, houses sprout up on land reclaimed from the sea, and in older Lagos, buildings are knocked down so that ambitious new ones might live. A street last seen six months ago is different today, sometimes imperceptibly so — a tiny store has appeared at a corner — and sometimes baldly so, with a structure gone, or shuttered, or expanded. Shops come and go. Today, a boutique’s slender mannequin in a tightly pinned dress; tomorrow, a home accessories shop with gilt-edged furniture on display. Admiralty Road is cluttered, pulsing, optimistic. It is the business heart of Lekki, in the highbrow part of Lagos called The Island. Twenty years ago, Lekki was swampland and today the houses in its estates cost millions of dollars. It was supposed to be mostly residential but now it is undecided, as though partly trying to fend off the relentless encroachment of commerce, and partly revelling in its ever-growing restaurants, nightclubs and shops. I live in Lekki, but not in its most expensive centre, Phase 1. My house is farther away, close to the behemoth that is the oil company Chevron’s headquarters. A modest house, by Lekki standards. “It will be under water in 30 years,” a European acquaintance, a diplomat in Lagos, said sourly when I told him, years ago, that I was building a house there. He hated Lagos, and spoke of Lagosians with the resentment of a person who disliked the popular kids in the playground but still wanted to be their friend. I half-shared his apocalyptic vision; he was speaking to something unheeding in Lagos’s development. Something almost reckless. So forward-looking is Lagos, headlong, rushing, dissatisfied in its own frenzy, that in its haste it might very well sacrifice long-term planning or the possibility of permanence. Or the faith of its citizens. One wonders always: have things been done properly? Eko Atlantic City, the new ultra-expensive slice of land reclaimed from the Atlantic Ocean, has already been mostly sold to developers, and promises Dubai-like infrastructure, but my reaction remains one of scepticism. I cannot stop imagining the ocean one day re-taking its own. My house had required some arcane engineering, sand-filling, levelling, to prevent the possibility of sinking. And during the construction, my relatives stopped by often to check on things. If you’re building a house you must be present, otherwise the builders will slap-dash your tiling and roughen your finishing. This is a city in a rush and corners must be cut. "Nigeria is to Africa what the US is to the Americas: it dominates Africa’ s cultural imagination " Lagos has an estimated population of 23.5m — estimated because Nigeria has not had a proper census in decades. Population numbers determine how much resources states receive from the federal government, and census-taking is always contested and politicised. Lagos is expected to become, in the next 10 years, one of the world’s mega-cities, a term that conceals in its almost triumphant preface the chaos of overpopulation. Nigeria is Africa’s most populous country — one-in-five Africans is Nigerian — and Lagos is Nigeria’s commercial centre, its cultural centre, the aspirational axis where dreams will live or die. And so people come. From other parts of Nigeria, from other West African countries, from other African countries, they come. Skilled workers come from countries as far away as South Africa while less-skilled workers are more likely to come from the countries that share a border with Nigeria. My gate man, Abdul, who has worked with me for six years, is a striking young Muslim man from the Republic of Niger, Nigeria’s northern neighbour. In his small ancestral village, Lagos was seen as the city of shining lights. He longed to leave and find work in Lagos. To live in Lagos and return twice a year with the sparkle of Lagos on his skin. Nigeria is to Africa what the United States is to the Americas: it dominates Africa’s cultural imagination in a mix of admiration, resentment, affection and distrust. And the best of Nigeria’s contemporary culture — music, film, fashion, literature and art — is tied in some way to Lagos. If Lagos has a theme it is the hustle — the striving and trying. The working class does the impossible to scrape a living. The middle class has a side hustle. The banker sews clothes. The telecommunications analyst sells nappies. The school teacher organises private home lessons. Commerce rules. Enterprising people scrawl their advertisements on public walls, in chalk: “Call for affordable generator”. “I am buying condemned inverter”. “Need a washerman?” Perhaps this is why corporations are not viewed with the knowing suspicion so common in the West. “Branding” is a word entirely free of irony, and people use it to refer even to themselves. “I want to become a big brand,” young people brazenly say. Big companies adopt state schools and refurbish them, they organise deworming exercises in poor areas, they award prizes to journalists. Even the too-few green spaces in public areas are branded, a burst of beautiful shrubs and plants defaced with the logo of whatever bank or telecommunications company is paying for its upkeep. This is a city of blurred boundaries. Religion and commerce are intertwined. Lagos has a Muslim population but, like all of Southern Nigeria, it is a predominantly Christian city. Drive past a gleaming modern building and it might be a bank or a church. Huge signboards advertise church programmes with photos of nicely dressed pastors, and on Sundays the city is as close as it can get to being traffic-free, because Lagosians are at rest, back home from morning service. Pentecostal Christianity is fashionable, prayers are held before corporate board meetings, and “We thank God” is an appropriate response to a compliment, or even merely to the question, “How are you?” This Christianity is selectively conservative, it glances away from government corruption, preaches prosperity, casts ostentatious wealth as a blessing, and disapproves of socially progressive norms. Women are to submit to their husbands. Hierarchies matter. God wants you to be rich. But it also unites Lagosians; people who attend the same church become surrogate families, and together they attend large vigil services more exciting than music concerts, where urbane men and glamorous women sing praise-songs deep into the night and in the morning return to their well-paid jobs in the high rises of The Island. In Lagos, ethnicity both matters and doesn’t matter. Lagos is ancestral Yoruba land and Yoruba is spoken widely, but it is also Nigeria’s polyglot centre, and the dream-seekers who have come from all parts of the country communicate by Nigeria’s official language of English and unofficial lingua franca of Pidgin English. Some areas are known as ethnic — the Hausa sector where working-class Northern Muslims live, the areas with large markets run by people from my own southeastern Igbo ethnic group — but none of them are affluent. With wealth, overt appeals to ethnicity retreat. One of the ubiquitous yellow ’danfo’ buses that cruise the clogged city Always Ready, Monochrome Lagos / Logo Oluwamuyiwa My cousin lives in a lower middle class area, heavily populated by Igbo traders. Once, on my way to visit her, the car stuck in traffic, a hawker pressing his packs of chewing gum against my window. Gabriel my driver of 10 years said to me, “Ma, your bag.” A simple reminder. I swiftly moved my handbag from the back seat to the floor, pushed it under my seat. My cousin was robbed in traffic on her way home from work, a gun to her head, her bag and phone taken, and beside her people kept slow-driving, face-forward. And now she has a fake bag and a fake phone that she leaves on display in her front seat whenever she drives home, because robbers target women driving alone, and if she has nothing to give them they might shoot her. My brother-in-law was also robbed not far from here. He was in traffic on a bright afternoon, his windows down, and someone shouted from the outside, something about his car, and he looked out of the window and back to the road and in that brief sliver of time a hand slid through the other window and his phone was gone. He told the story, later, with a tinge of admiring defeat. "To live in Lagos is to live on distrust. You assume you will be cheated" He, a real Lagosian who had lived in Lagos for 40 years and knew its wiles and its corners, and yet they had managed to fool him. He had fallen for the seamless ingenuity of Lagos’s thieves. To live in Lagos is to live on distrust. You assume you will be cheated, and what matters is that you avert it, that you will not be taken in by it. Lagosians will speak of this with something close to pride, as though their survival is a testament to their fortitude, because Lagos is Lagos. It does not have the tame amiability of Accra. It is not like Nairobi where flowers are sold in traffic. In other parts of Lagos, especially the wealthy areas on The Island, I wouldn’t hide my handbag in traffic, because I would assume myself to be safe. Here, security is status. Lagos is a city of estates; groups of houses, each individually walled off, are enclosed in yet another walled fence, with a central gate and a level of security proportional to the residents’ privilege. The estates not blessed with wealth lock their gates before midnight, to keep out armed robbers. Nightclub-goers living there know not to return home until 5am when the gates are opened. Expensive estates have elaborate set-ups at their entrances: you park your car and wait for the security guards to call whomever you’re visiting, or you are given a visitor’s card as identification, or you are asked to open your boot, or a jaunty guard walks around your car with a mirror lest you have a bomb strapped underneath. In a city like Mumbai, which is as complicated as Lagos, it is easy to understand why the expensive parts are expensive just by driving through them, but in Lagos one might be confused. Mansions sit Buddha-like behind high gates but the streets still have potholes, and are still half-sunken in puddles during the rainy season and still have the ramshackle kiosk in a corner where drivers buy their lunch. High-end estates still have about them an air of the unfinished. Next to a perfectly landscaped compound with ornate gates might sit an empty lot, astonishingly expensive, and overgrown with weeds and grass. live in Lekki and dream of Old Ikoyi. British colonial government officers lived in Old Ikoyi starting in the Twenties, a time of mild apartheid when Africans could not live there and could not go to the “white” hospital, and could not apply for high-profile jobs. Today, Old Ikoyi has about it that stubborn, undeniable beauty that is the troubled legacy of injustice. With its leafy grounds, and trees leaning across the streets, it reminds me a little of my childhood in the small university town of Nsukka, an eight-hour drive from Lagos: quiet, restful, frangipani trees dotting the compound, purple bougainvillea climbing the walls. And so I find myself wishing I lived in Old Ikoyi and mourning its slow disappearance. Gracious columned houses are being knocked down for tall apartment buildings and large homes with unintentionally baroque facades. “Beware of Lagos”, I heard often while growing up on the other side of Nigeria. Lagos was said to be a city of shallowness and phony people. There were many shimmering, mythical examples of this, stories repeated in various permutations, with the characters from different ethnic groups, and small details changed: the suave man who drives a Range Rover but is penniless and lives on the couches of friends; the beautiful woman who parades herself as an accomplished business person but is really a con artist. And who would blame them, those self-reinventors so firmly invested in their own burnished surfaces? "You can talk your way into almost any space in Lagos if you look the part and drive the right car" Here, appearance matters. You can talk your way into almost any space in Lagos if you look the part and drive the right car. In many estates, the guards fling open the gates when the latest model of a particular brand of car drives up, the questions they have been trained to ask promptly forgotten. But approach in an old Toyota and they will unleash their petty power. Snobbery here is unsubtle. Western designer logos are so common among elite Lagosians that style journalists write of Gucci and Chanel as though they were easily affordable by a majority of the people. Still, style is democratic. Young working-class women are the most original: they shop in open markets, a mass of secondhand clothes spread on the ground under umbrellas, and they emerge in the perfect pair of skinny jeans, the right flattering dresses. Young working-class men are not left behind, in their long-sleeved tucked-in shirts, their crisp traditional matching tunics and trousers. And so Lagos intimidates with its materialism, its insolence, its beautiful people. A young woman told me that when she was considering entering the Miss Nigeria beauty pageant she decided not to try out in Lagos, even though she lived there. “Too many fine babes in Lagos,” she said. And so she went to Enugu, her ancestral hometown, where she believed her chances were better. Young people complain of the dating scene. Nobody is honest, they say. Men and women perform. Everyone is looking for what is shinier and better. “Why do you choose to live in Lagos, then?” I once asked a young woman. Every time I ask this of a young person dissatisfied with Lagos, they invariably look puzzled to be asked, as though they assumed it to be obvious they would never consider leaving. Everybody complains about Lagos but nobody wants to leave. And why do I live here? Why didn’t I build my house in Enugu, for example, a slow, clean, appealing city in the southeast, close to where I grew up? "Lagos has a dynamism. An absence of pallor . You can feel it in the uncomfortable humid air" It is clichéd to speak of the “energy” of Lagos, and it can sometimes sound like a defensive retort in the face of the city’s many infrastructural challenges. But Lagos does have a quality for which “energy” is the most honest description. A dynamism. An absence of pallor. You can feel it in the uncomfortable humid air — the talent, the ingenuity, the bursting multi-ness of everything, the self-confidence of a city that knows it matters. The only real functioning Nigerian port is in Lagos, and business people from all over the country have no choice but to import their goods through there. Nigerian business is headquartered in Lagos; not only the banks, and the telecommunications and oil and advertising companies, but also the emerging creative industries. Art galleries have frequent exhibitions of Nigeria’s best artists. Fashion Week is here. The concerts are the biggest and noisiest. Nollywood stars might not shoot their films in Lagos — it’s too expensive — but they premiere them in Lagos. The production of culture works in service to Lagos’s unassailable cool. There are some things of conventional touristic appeal. The last gasp of Brazilian architecture in the oldest parts of Lagos, houses built by formerly enslaved Africans who, starting in the 1830s, returned from Brazil and settled in Lagos. The Lekki market, where beautiful sculptures and ornaments blend with kitsch, and where the sellers speak that brand of English reserved for foreigners. The National Museum with its carefully tended flowers outside the building and inside an air of exquisite abandon. The Lekki Conservation Centre, a small nature reserve, with bounteous greenery and some small animals. The first time I visited, with a friend, I asked the ticketing person what we might hope to see. “No lions or elephants,” she said archly. The highlights are the gorgeous birds, and the monkeys, and the sheer surprise of an oasis of nature in the middle of Lagos’s bustle. The nearby beaches are dirty and overcrowded but the beaches one reaches by taking a speedboat across the waters are clean, dotted with beach houses, and flanked by palms. The restaurants in Lagos are owned by a Lebanese “mafia”, a friend once told me, only half-joking. Nigeria has a significant Lebanese presence. They very rarely inter-marry with Nigerians, and I sense in some Lebanese employers a unique scorn for their Nigerian staff, but their roots in Nigeria are firm. They are Lebanese-Nigerians. And they own many restaurants, and their mark is obvious in the ubiquity of the shawarma. Young people go out for a shawarma. Kids ask for shawarmas as treats. There are, of course, Nigerian-owned restaurants. The chains with basic, not untasty food, the mid-level restaurants that dispense with frills and serve the jollof rice one might have cooked at home, and the high-end restaurants that labour under the weight of their own pretensions. There are quirky shops that cater mostly to a new Lagos tribe, the returnees: young people who have returned from schooling in the US or Europe with new ideas, and might for example suggest that a thing being “handmade” were remarkable, as though hand-making things were not the Nigerian norm. They represent a new globalised Nigerian, situated in Nigeria, au fait about the world. It is the breathing human architecture of Lagos that thrills me most. For a novelist, no city is better for observing human beings. On Sundays, when the roads are not clogged up, I like to be driven around Lagos, headed nowhere, watching the city. Past bus stops full of people with earphones stuck in their ears. A roadside market with colourful bras swinging from a balcony, wheelbarrows filled with carrots, a table laid out with wigs. Fat, glorious watermelons piled high. Hawkers selling onions, eggs, bread. In gutters clogged with sludgy, green water and cans and plastic bags, I imagine the possibility of a clean city. Lagos is full of notices. “This house is not for sale” is the most common, scrawled on walls, a warning to those who might be duped by real estate shysters. Near a mosque, where a fashionable young woman in jeans and a headscarf walks past, is this in green letters: “Chief Imam of Lagos Says No Parking Here”. From a bridge, I look across at shirtless men fishing on flimsy canoes. The secondhand books spread on low tables have curled covers, copies of Mastering Mathematics beside How to Win Friends and Influence People. On these drives, I think of how quickly fights and friendships are formed in Lagos. A yellow danfo bus has hit another and both conductors have leapt out for a swift fight. People make friends while queuing — at banks, airports, bus stops — and they unite over obvious jokes and shared complaints. At night, there are swathes of Lagos that are a gloomy grey from power cuts, lit only by a few generator-borne lights, and there are areas that are bright and glittering. And in both one sees the promise of this city: that you will find your kin, where you fit, that there is a space somewhere in Lagos for you. Source

Following the recent arrest and subsequent release of 57 homosexuals in Lagos, LIB recently had a chat with popular gay rights activist, Bisi Alimi who visited our studio in company of his Australian husband, Anthony. According to Alimi, in his prime, he attended several gay parties in Victoria Island, Lagos with alot of posh kids and it was fun. He went on to call on more people to lend their voices to fighting for gay people in Nigeria, 'I think people that have the platform should speak up. If you have the resources, if you have the name, even if you don't come out as gay, you can stand u and speak on the issue' he said. Source

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Uchenna Ude, an award-winning Nigerian human rights activist and writer has launched a campaign tagged #HowIResist, which is aimed at promoting LGBT visibility in Nigeria and affirming that LGBT persons are resilient in the face of oppression and prejudice. The aim of the campaign, he said, is to reject the widespread lies that LGBT people “are living a lifestyle or that they are demon-possessed or in need of spiritual guidance.” LGBT people show resilience in many ways, Ude said: “They resist the unjust laws that seek to shut them in as prisoners or shut them out in the shadows. “They resist the fellow countrymen and women who seek to invalidate them. “They resist the lies that they do not matter. “They resist by daring to live authentically and to love without fear. “They resist from a place of shadows, but they resist all the same. In their everyday lives, they tell you: ‘I am here.’ “ He said that, over the next few days, he will share photos from the campaign, which will serve as “a response to prejudice, a determination of survival, and a statement of the fact that there are people among us who just want to live and let live.” Photos in the campaign were submitted by “a number of LGBT young Nigerians who came together to lend their voices to provide visibility to the Nigerian LGBT community,” he said. Below are some photos and quotations from the campaign. Source

The new film ‘We Don’t Live Here Anymore’ is directed by Tope Oshin, an award-winning Nigerian film director and producer notable for working on some of the highest box office breaking Nigerian films such as ‘Fifty’ ‘Shuga’ ‘The Wedding Party2’ ‘Journey to Self’ and ‘Tinsel’ (TV Series). Writing credits for the film goes to Noni Salma, a Nigerian U.S-based transgender filmmaker. Salma also wrote the film ‘Hell or High Water’ and ‘Veil of Silence’ a documentary film about LGBT struggle in Nigeria, all in collaboration with TIERs. ‘We Don’t Live Here Anymore’ is about two teenage boys Tolu Bajulaiye(Francis Sule) and Chidi Egwuonwu(Temidayo Akinboro) in the fictional Prominence high school who both find themselves embroiled in a high stake scandal that could alter the course of their future. With an impending expulsion at bay, Tolu’s mother Nike (Funlola Aofiyebi Raimi) who is a powerful matriarch pulls all the strings within her palm and resets the tone into what would become a battle of class, blackballing and a triggering society ready to punish anything besides the status-quo. Source

Kenny Badmus shares story of the Nigerian man he met at the gym yesterday. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. I knew he was Nigerian and a Yoruba man because he pronounced 'eat' as 'heat,' and 'walk' as 'work.' Just the way I speak. His body stretched out of a trunk of pure muscles rooted in black power. When he walked, he carried himself with measured chaos as though he was holding a basketball between his thighs. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. Though I never spoke to him, I eavesdropped on his phone call and heard he called someone my baby girl. "Baby girl," he said, "Tell Junior, daddy loves him. I'm still at the office, and I doubt I will come home tonight." When he got off the call, his brows broke a sweat as he balanced his shoulders under the squat bar. He scanned me with his large brown eyes; I clutched a dumbbell with a fist of disbelief and awe. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. He tied a white towel around his tapered waist as he shuffled around in the locker room looking for something. I looked around, and there's only one other person at the gym. The other person smiled and walked away from the Nigerian man and me. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. He was biting his nails as he approached the shower. When he turned and saw me looking at him, he widened his eyes, straightened his lips and stared at me longer than I could bear. I saw a Nigerian man at my fitness center tonight. He lingered on in the shower stall and scrubbed his body endlessly. By 11:25 PM, I dried my body, poured some cocoa butter on my skin, laced my Adidas and walked away as fast as I could. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. I couldn't walk away from him. On my way out, the detective in me took over my dark soul and ordered me to go back. I climbed back the stairs and tiptoed to the shower holding my breath. I saw a married Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. He knelt down in the shower stall sucking another man's dick. If you are his baby girl, quit trying to change him into a man you want him to be. This man has taken a knee, and the game is over. I saw a Nigerian man at the fitness center tonight. Lord, I'm on my knees right now praying that he has the courage to tell his baby girl what keeps him back at work this late. I pray dear Lord that he quits filling his emptiness with sex and that he embraces who he is because I used to be that guy who told my wife I was working late tonight.