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How To Test-Drive Your Woman (Part 2)


Iris

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The article, last week, was a runaway success and it engaged over 20,000 readers. There were many online comments and emails debating and discussing the topic: ‘Why you should test- drive your partner before marriage.’

 

Some rely on their family or friends to choose a partner for them, while some listen to their pastor! However, if you have a mind of your own and are responsible for your heart’s desires, please read on.

 

Let me also make a clarification: This article is for women of marrying age (above 18 years of age) who are looking for or have found the right partner. If you have the woman of your dreams in your sights, then you should definitely test-drive her through these stages.

 

The initial stage

 

Physical attraction is important and is perhaps the first thing in the start of a relationship. If you are not attracted to her, this may cause problems later. You need to also evaluate whether she is fun and makes you laugh. Is the woman of your dream good company or just an ass? Is she mental, aggressive, clingy and immature? Does she like the things you like? Can you spend a whole day in her company and not be bored to death? If you do not like her that much, leave her by the roadside.

 

The second stage

 

Evaluate where she is coming from and where she is going. What are her values? What are her dreams and aspirations? Is she describing the kind of life you want for yourself and your future family? What type of woman is she? Is she a liar, unserious and cannot be trusted with your friends? A friend of mine was always farting in public. His girlfriend could not tolerate this. They still got married, regardless, but the farting, snoring and, of course, other disrespectful behaviour eventually destroyed the marriage: after three children!

 

You now also need to define what you want from the relationship. Is marriage an investment? Do you want the so-called mysterious happiness, emotional and financial security and that ephemeral love? Can she provide these for you and the family? Is she doing that right now? Are you employed and she is not? If she is always asking you for money and is not pulling her weight, she may be a dud after marriage. Is she rich and famous? Could you afford to get lost in her shadow or do you want a life of your own? Can you stand on your own? Would she be able to live with a successful wife? Can she live in your shadow?

 

The third stage

 

How old is she exactly? Is she in good health? Are there any medical issues that you should know about? Are there any family genetic diseases such as sickle cell disease or other rare killers? Be sure to ask and talk to her friends and family openly. What about her HIV or Hepatitis status? Have you asked and checked? You should, before moving things further.

 

Now, the good stuff:

 

We conducted a survey here in Nigeria to determine attitudes towards premarital sex. We asked 100 consecutive unselected adults and the following is the result of the survey.

 

-What is your age? Our respondents were aged 20 to 40 years.

 

-Are you male or female? Fifty-two per cent were males

 

-Are you single, separated, divorced, married or widowed? Most were single: 78 per cent and 20 per cent were married and a tiny number divorced.

 

-If single, are you sexually active? Of the single people, 50 per cent are sexually active.

 

-If divorced, widowed or married, did you engage in premarital sex? 60 per cent engaged in premarital sex.

 

-What is your view on premarital sex: Okay or not okay? Forty-eight per cent said it was not okay, 32 per cent said it was okay and 20 per cent did not commit either way.

 

Interestingly, a few married individuals who had engaged in premarital sex and some sexually active single persons felt it was wrong!

 

Conclusion

 

Well, information is power and you have a choice.

 

From The Punch Newspapers

 

P.S- Some pronouns were changed to fit.

 

Bye

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