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When your woman Is better in bed than you are


kimi

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It does happen. Your girlfriend may have far more skill in bed than you do. My comment: what in the world were you doing when your mates were getting trained! 

 

If this is your situation, no worries; no cause for alarm. We've got something just for you! This post has been carefully put together to help you keep your girlfriend in the interim -repeat steps as often as possible and you would certainly attain mastery. 

 

Useful Tips

 

  1. Be sure that her interest level in you is in the region of the 80s/90s. She must be madly in love with you. Otherwise, exit that relationship and if you do not heed this warning, we shall be reading about your incompetence in the thread 'butches cry too'
  2. The next thing to do is to focus on 'love'. Emphasize how important an emotional connection is. Buy her over into all of that crap *wink*
  3. When 1 and 2 above have been successfully accomplished, be sure to visit our post on 'Porn watching'. You will gain useful insights on how to begin 'watching' porn.
  4. Start watching Porn
  5. Start with your body. Perfect the art of knowing what makes a woman's body quiver. If you detest self service, quit that thought immediately and masturbate already!!
  6. Masturbate vigorously
  7. Masturbate everyday
  8. Increase the frequency to 3times daily. It should be your new favourite thing to do in the www (whole wide world)
  9. If you choose 'not' to self service after these wise words, Billymanda next door would always be ready with dildo in hand to f***k your babe 5times daily -after you've done a poor job of it and left her as horny as hell!
  10. On D-day, confidence is key. Refrain from having panic attacks or spewing words such as 'jisox, chimo, mogbe, kini mo mo, mo mo se, egbami! No no absolutely not!
  11. Choose instead to start the day with soothing and romantic words. Sweetim, obim, baby girl, beautiful flower, rose of ipetumodu etc... these ought to work just fine.
  12. Remember to savour the moment. The love she feels for you would always magnify 'everything'. Do your bit.  It is useful to be open. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. 
  13. You could also use lines such as "babe, been a while I have been with anyone. I'm a bit rusty. Was waiting for the right one; didn't want to settle. Now that's i've met her -you; I hope to get better with you and you alone". She's a girl afterall, if she loves you, those words would work like magic!
  14. *Remember to undress her. Enjoy the view and errr... we do not do explicit content here! Go away!

 

 

The End

 

 

Our sincere appreciation goes out to all our fans for tuning in day after day! Our next post shall be on 'First time sex: what to do'

 

Remember to like us on facebook, follow us on twitter and Instagram!

 

xx

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lmao... informative! I'm learning fast. the self service isn't working... customer care? I want to do with an agent.

 

Hahahahahahaa! You just spoilt spoilt rotten! You want to do abi? lemme run a quick check for you madame!

 

*voice prompt*

"All agents are current unavailable for private lessons; they are presently 'working' some ass and the girls are screaming in tongues. The only English heard 5minutes ago was: continue bebe, it is sweeting my bodi"

 

Hahahahahaha! Longest voice prompt ever! Stay on the queue my darling

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lmao! I'm on queue... I want some bodi sweeting touchings too.

 

Hahahahahaha! Fairy o! You haff spoilt finish.

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Hahaha!! All of you on this thread who have bought your rapture bus ticket. Please return it. We the bus committee have decided we don't want you on our rapture bus.

Loooollll.

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Hahahahaha. A lot of self servicing going on. Haaaa! People won't be able to walk in a straight line after this...

;)/>

they ain't even queuing straight. parts be itching. lol

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they ain't even queuing straight. parts be itching. lol

 

Hahahahahaha! The f***k is that?! Funny sh**! Fairy o...LOL

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Hahaha!! All of you on this thread who have bought your rapture bus ticket. Please return it. We the bus committee have decided we don't want you on our rapture bus.

Loooollll.

 

uh uh yeah right! Your chairperson is no stranger to this thread; She was speaking in diverse tongues earlier... *wink*

 

*goes to confirm* Yo Fairy! Had your turn yet?

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Kimi, clarify which buttons o. *suspicious*

Fairy, run!

 

Hahahahaha! Rapturable bus committe member indeed! Fairy, the buttons were pushed and squeezed delicately. You may proceed. Still got some appetite?

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  • 3 years later...
On ‎11‎/‎3‎/‎2015 at 10:55 PM, kimi said:

It does happen. Your girlfriend may have far more skill in bed than you do. My comment: what in the world were you doing when your mates were getting trained! 

 

If this is your situation, no worries; no cause for alarm. We've got something just for you! This post has been carefully put together to help you keep your girlfriend in the interim -repeat steps as often as possible and you would certainly attain mastery. 

 

Useful Tips

 

 

  1. Be sure that her interest level in you is in the region of the 80s/90s. She must be madly in love with you. Otherwise, exit that relationship and if you do not heed this warning, we shall be reading about your incompetence in the thread 'butches cry too'
  2. The next thing to do is to focus on 'love'. Emphasize how important an emotional connection is. Buy her over into all of that crap *wink*
  3. When 1 and 2 above have been successfully accomplished, be sure to visit our post on 'BeHoly watching'. You will gain useful insights on how to begin 'watching' BeHoly.
  4. Start watching BeHoly
  5. Start with your body. Perfect the art of knowing what makes a woman's body quiver. If you detest self service, quit that thought immediately and masturbate already!!
  6. Masturbate vigorously
  7. Masturbate everyday
  8. Increase the frequency to 3times daily. It should be your new favourite thing to do in the www (whole wide world)
  9. If you choose 'not' to self service after these wise words, Billymanda next door would always be ready with dildo in hand to f***k your babe 5times daily -after you've done a poor job of it and left her as horny as hell!
  10. On D-day, confidence is key. Refrain from having panic attacks or spewing words such as 'jisox, chimo, mogbe, kini mo mo, mo mo se, egbami! No no absolutely not!
  11. Choose instead to start the day with soothing and romantic words. Sweetim, obim, baby girl, beautiful flower, rose of ipetumodu etc... these ought to work just fine.
  12. Remember to savour the moment. The love she feels for you would always magnify 'everything'. Do your bit.  It is useful to be open. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. 
  13. You could also use lines such as "babe, been a while I have been with anyone. I'm a bit rusty. Was waiting for the right one; didn't want to settle. Now that's i've met her -you; I hope to get better with you and you alone". She's a girl afterall, if she loves you, those words would work like magic!
  14. *Remember to undress her. Enjoy the view and errr... we do not do explicit content here! Go away!

 

 

 

The End

 

 

Our sincere appreciation goes out to all our fans for tuning in day after day! Our next post shall be on 'First time sex: what to do'

 

Remember to like us on facebook, follow us on twitter and Instagram!

 

xx

Are you better than your woman in bed? 😀 Don't run Forest 

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1 hour ago, Michelle said:

Are you better than your woman in bed? 😀 Don't run Forest 

Hahahahaha... 👣👣🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

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