Jump to content
Volunteer with Us at Naijalez: Empowering Nigerian Lesbian Community ×
Nigerian Lesbian Forum

Dear Tops


dequeen

Recommended Posts

Okay. My question goes to the "tops" in relationships and every other person really.

 

Do you think it's okay for a "bottom" to ask a "top" out?

 

Please give your answers with reasons to back. Thankyou.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anybody can ask anybody out now. Who cares who asks who out, so far the asking out was done by someone to someone and the person accepts, case closed......

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Administrators

I only recently found out the meaning of tops and bottoms. Never knew such existed in the Lesbian community. I agree with the other ladies anyone can ask anyone out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators

I am a recent convert of the "no labels" crew. I stopped living in boxes a while back as I evolved as a person. Honestly, living in boxes stiffles and puts undue pressure on individuals and relationships.

 

Like others have stated, It absolutely doesn't matter who does the asking out or proposing. These things shouldn't matter. What must at the end of the day is that you both allow yourselves to 'feel' and be 'free' to express that feeling however it comes to you in the moment -rather than allow certain societal role-based parameters set the tone or dictaTe the workings/dynamics of your relationship.

  • Like 1
  • Downvote 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This thread is particularly interesting to me cos just recently I had a rather annoying discussion with sum gal , and along d line she was like. ...re u stud or femme...more like re u top or bottom,

my response was : Gal I am Jenny...I am lesbian...I am me.

And den in her words,she said - "Our community has got stereotypes and classifications, u must fall sumwhere"

 

Well....to this blabbing of hers I gave no response ,but deep in my heart I was like - look it's peepol like u that make this shit of ours look unreal and untrue.

 

Jst lik kimi said - life is too short to place unnecessary boundaries and boxes around our lives, wat matters here is the ability to "FEEL" and the freedom to EXPRESS real feelings.

 

Al dat thrashy talk abt who's top and who's bottom. ... has never really made any sense to me.

I love women and that is it ...and this isn't sumtin dat suddenly just dawned on me, av known am into women since I was 4 / 5 years old.

 

A woman is a woman. ...I don't care abt top / bottom, and any woman can be the one to make the first move.

 

I therefore implore us; not to allow societal role based classifications / stereotypes to dictate the tone of our relationships and put us in unnecessary life boxes.

U don't need no boxes....break out of dem and be YOU.

Be real...Be free....Live free

love who u wannn love...no stereotypes.

Life is too short my sista!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Should it matter who takes who out?

 

Your sexual position has nothing to do with how/what role to play. I guess its high time we lose that hetero- stereotype.

 

And this right here is the beauty of same sex Union. There are no gender- roles whatsoever, no guided set of rules to follow, it all falls on whoever is expressive enough to take that step.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Administrators

Should it matter who takes who out?

 

Your sexual position has nothing to do with how/what role to play. I guess its high time we lose that hetero- stereotype.

 

And this right here is the beauty of same sex Union. There are no gender- roles whatsoever, no guided set of rules to follow, it all falls on whoever is expressive enough to take that step.

Preach!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oddly I can understand why she would ask. Some 'Tops' are (for lack of a better word) too Patriarch. Like their way always has to come first, the types that won't do any domestic chores and yet be angry that the house is a mess. Let's not deny we don't know women who feel they should be treated as Sugar Daddies. (And who has ever heard of a Baby girl asking a sugar daddy out )

 

Babe if you feel the person is soo much of a 'Top' and you are into that, then work on your green lights.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oddly I can understand why she would ask. Some 'Tops' are (for lack of a better word) too Patriarch. Like their way always to come first, the types that won't do any domestic chores and yet be angry that the house is a mess. Let's not deny we don't know women who feel they should be treated as Sugar Daddies. (And who has ever heard of a Baby girl asking a sugar daddy out

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Labels keep everything nice and tidy.

Having said that, i think its okay for a bottom to ask a top out. I am a top rolleyes.gif and i enjoy been chased.

EDITED - 23/12/2018

Why did i even say i was a top please? I'm versatile jor.

Plus aren't top, bottom and versatile gay men lingo?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 year later...
On ‎7‎/‎5‎/‎2017 at 11:16 AM, dequeen said:

Okay. My question goes to the "tops" in relationships and every other person really.

 

Do you think it's okay for a "bottom" to ask a "top" out?

 

Please give your answers with reasons to back. Thankyou.

Absolutely. I would love the show of confidence...total turn on.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Lmao why did my heart skip when i saw this post? I was like "what have we done again?? Its been a while since studs caught any heat on this forum. The bisexuals have been taking several for the team. What have we done??" Then i opened it and saw it was an old post and all was well with the world again 😁😁

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Moderators
42 minutes ago, Hawken said:

Lmao why did my heart skip when i saw this post? I was like "what have we done again?? Its been a while since studs caught any heat on this forum. The bisexuals have been taking several for the team. What have we done??" Then i opened it and saw it was an old post and all was well with the world again 😁😁

Hahahahaha. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...