PixieRose Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 In our country that is steeped in homophobia, do you ladies ever wish to be straight and do you think that your lives would be happier, easier, more fufilling and generally better if you were straight? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Txunamy Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 Lol.. I literally laughed out loud when I saw the headline. For me it's a no brainer..if I ever wish to be straight, I turn Straight. But I can't understand why I'd wish for something that is in my power. I am who I am, and I am mighty proud of it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VINA Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 Being straight is not some hard unachievable stunt. I lived as straight for the longest time. I wished and wished I could be gay and then one day I became myself. Been there done that, nothing there for me. So no, I don't wish that, Now what I really wish for is to be the richest black woman on earth. Hehehe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MENA Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 For me what l have come to understand over the years, is that you are just who you are. Is either you stop acting on your feelings but does not make you straight bcos within you, you know you are still very much attracted to girls. like my story, l fell in love with a woman who could pass for a mother to me. We lived together for like 10yrs, the first six years we were fully dating and the other four years the relationship was just mutual. The reason why,families and church pressure. so she pleased that we should stop and we have to pray about it to over our feelings for each. lt was a very tough struggle but somehow we did over came it. So at a time l thought, l was straight but still l couldn't date a guy. So what l did, was to have a long distance relationship bcos l couldn't stand a guy being on my neck. Then came the family and church pressure to get married being the first daughter of my mom, who had just two girls. My younger sister was already married. So after so pressure from my woman, bcos she always felt like people are feeling is her that is keeping me from settling down and l was over due. So l decided to settle and l got married to a child hood friend who has always been on my case and he's based abroad. The only reason why l decided to marry him, was because he is based abroad and we had this understanding that l will not relocate, within me, l needed my space. So the marriage was done glamorously, it was like a carnival. My woman sponsored it all to make me happy and escorted me with a fourteen sitter bus filled with all sort of gifts that will make a woman comfortable in marriage and my family was well pleased. Then three months passed and the marriage ended. The guy was a torn in my flesh , he makes trouble over every pin and the mother will not let me be. We got separated. As God will have, l took in the first month. when my child was old enough, l gifted every single thing l had out that has to do with that marriage. SO l relocated to get away from unnecessarily family issues. l have nothing for now for a start but l discovered this genuine peace of mind and am very happy even though l don't have much for now. And l also discovered l genuinely LOVE GIRLS , there is no other way to it, is just who you are. People are surprised at the easy l took the break up, but the truth is, bcos l just love girls. ls true Nigeria is homophobia , but the thing is that you don't have to front your relationships in public. Even the straight people don't go kissing in public in Nigeria , so why should l? This Nigeria! 1 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VINA Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 Wow @MENA that is one story. Kudos for taking that leap of faith. Everything will be fine in a jiffy. I am rooting for you. I always say it, can lez girls stop getting married to men for a moment??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MENA Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 5 minutes ago, vina said: Wow @MENA that is one story. Kudos for taking that leap of faith. Everything will be fine in a jiffy. I am rooting for you. I always say it, can lez girls stop getting married to men for a moment??? @vina Thanks 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators kimi Posted November 14, 2017 Moderators Share Posted November 14, 2017 Lol. Like Vina, I would rather spend those wishes on more world/life changing accomplishments. Did I ever wish this? Certainly. I was younger and wanted so much to be like everyone else. 😊 Now, Lol. I am older and wiser and I know better... the path comes with massive challenges. It's never easy when you are swimming against the tides but the truth is there is no better way to live than to be true to one's self. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators kimi Posted November 14, 2017 Moderators Share Posted November 14, 2017 Thanks for this topic @PixieRose . I see you're settling in rather nicely Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scarlet Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 Yes, I do wish I was straight, sometimes. to be honest, its easier to be straight. because being gay in the Nigerian society is such a hard, expensive and unsustainable existence, one spent in fear, living in closet, humiliation, and if unfortunate could be maim, or killed. Would I have been happier being straight ? No. I won't. But a least I will not always look over my shoulders and wish things turned out differently. Don't get me wrong, I love being gay. I love women, if I could choose to be straight? I wouldn't. I could only wish. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators kimi Posted November 14, 2017 Moderators Share Posted November 14, 2017 2 hours ago, scarlet said: because being gay in the Nigerian society is such a hard, expensive That right there is a sad reality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teewhy Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 What a question! As a matter of fact and sincerity, I live my life happier, easier, more fufilling, accomplished, more accomodating and far better than a straight woman. And if I have 9 lives, I would still live blessed and happier more than a straight woman would. I love me myself and I this way. Even a straight girl will tell you it's not easy, life itself is not easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PixieRose Posted November 14, 2017 Author Share Posted November 14, 2017 6 hours ago, MENA said: For me what l have come to understand over the years, is that you are just who you are. Is either you stop acting on your feelings but does not make you straight bcos within you, you know you are still very much attracted to girls. like my story, l fell in love with a woman who could pass for a mother to me. We lived together for like 10yrs, the first six years we were fully dating and the other four years the relationship was just mutual. The reason why,families and church pressure. so she pleased that we should stop and we have to pray about it to over our feelings for each. lt was a very tough struggle but somehow we did over came it. So at a time l thought, l was straight but still l couldn't date a guy. So what l did, was to have a long distance relationship bcos l couldn't stand a guy being on my neck. Then came the family and church pressure to get married being the first daughter of my mom, who had just two girls. My younger sister was already married. So after so pressure from my woman, bcos she always felt like people are feeling is her that is keeping me from settling down and l was over due. So l decided to settle and l got married to a child hood friend who has always been on my case and he's based abroad. The only reason why l decided to marry him, was because he is based abroad and we had this understanding that l will not relocate, within me, l needed my space. So the marriage was done glamorously, it was like a carnival. My woman sponsored it all to make me happy and escorted me with a fourteen sitter bus filled with all sort of gifts that will make a woman comfortable in marriage and my family was well pleased. Then three months passed and the marriage ended. The guy was a torn in my flesh , he makes trouble over every pin and the mother will not let me be. We got separated. As God will have, l took in the first month. when my child was old enough, l gifted every single thing l had out that has to do with that marriage. SO l relocated to get away from unnecessarily family issues. l have nothing for now for a start but l discovered this genuine peace of mind and am very happy even though l don't have much for now. And l also discovered l genuinely LOVE GIRLS , there is no other way to it, is just who you are. People are surprised at the easy l took the break up, but the truth is, bcos l just love girls. ls true Nigeria is homophobia , but the thing is that you don't have to front your relationships in public. Even the straight people don't go kissing in public in Nigeria , so why should l? This Nigeria! I love your story. Honestly I wish you all the best! 😊 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PixieRose Posted November 14, 2017 Author Share Posted November 14, 2017 6 hours ago, kimi said: Thanks for this topic @PixieRose . I see you're settling in rather nicely Thank you @kimi! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PixieRose Posted November 14, 2017 Author Share Posted November 14, 2017 2 hours ago, Teewhy said: What a question! As a matter of fact and sincerity, I live my life happier, easier, more fufilling, accomplished, more accomodating and far better than a straight woman. And if I have 9 lives, I would still live blessed and happier more than a straight woman would. I love me myself and I this way. Even a straight girl will tell you it's not easy, life itself is not easy. Honestly, I love your answer. I always thought that being gay gave me an automatic bulls**t detector when it came to guys who claimed to be interested in me. It's so nice that you are able to live an awesome life. kudos! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MENA Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 1 hour ago, PixieRose said: I love your story. Honestly I wish you all the best! 😊 Thanks @PixieRose l just felt like to share, maybe it will help someone's struggle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phegore Posted November 15, 2017 Share Posted November 15, 2017 There was a point in my life where I'll go i I I wouldn't change it...i wouldn't be me if i did. thats a simple fact of life. i remember once being told that it was something i could work through if i truly wanted to, and it was then that i realized there is no straight version of me. you either get the gay me or the closeted me, and honestly the closeted me was no fun. Being gay has taught me soo much, not just about myself but about how the world works. I'm not saying I'm an expert but it's taught me tolerance and it's taught me to judge people for how they are not who they are. It's taught me that it's ok to be myself and not to try and be anyone else. And while people argue that turning straight wouldn't take the things I learned away, I'm still learning I don't think im anywhere close to understanding myself but I learn more everyday. And it's all because I'm gay. So like I said I wouldn't change. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farida Posted November 15, 2017 Share Posted November 15, 2017 Lol i was only here for the comments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matty Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 On 11/14/2017 at 12:09 PM, MENA said: For me what l have come to understand over the years, is that you are just who you are. Is either you stop acting on your feelings but does not make you straight bcos within you, you know you are still very much attracted to girls. like my story, l fell in love with a woman who could pass for a mother to me. We lived together for like 10yrs, the first six years we were fully dating and the other four years the relationship was just mutual. The reason why,families and church pressure. so she pleased that we should stop and we have to pray about it to over our feelings for each. lt was a very tough struggle but somehow we did over came it. So at a time l thought, l was straight but still l couldn't date a guy. So what l did, was to have a long distance relationship bcos l couldn't stand a guy being on my neck. Then came the family and church pressure to get married being the first daughter of my mom, who had just two girls. My younger sister was already married. So after so pressure from my woman, bcos she always felt like people are feeling is her that is keeping me from settling down and l was over due. So l decided to settle and l got married to a child hood friend who has always been on my case and he's based abroad. The only reason why l decided to marry him, was because he is based abroad and we had this understanding that l will not relocate, within me, l needed my space. So the marriage was done glamorously, it was like a carnival. My woman sponsored it all to make me happy and escorted me with a fourteen sitter bus filled with all sort of gifts that will make a woman comfortable in marriage and my family was well pleased. Then three months passed and the marriage ended. The guy was a torn in my flesh , he makes trouble over every pin and the mother will not let me be. We got separated. As God will have, l took in the first month. when my child was old enough, l gifted every single thing l had out that has to do with that marriage. SO l relocated to get away from unnecessarily family issues. l have nothing for now for a start but l discovered this genuine peace of mind and am very happy even though l don't have much for now. And l also discovered l genuinely LOVE GIRLS , there is no other way to it, is just who you are. People are surprised at the easy l took the break up, but the truth is, bcos l just love girls. ls true Nigeria is homophobia , but the thing is that you don't have to front your relationships in public. Even the straight people don't go kissing in public in Nigeria , so why should l? This Nigeria! Wow..... Wow.... *hugs* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matty Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 I love girls girls girls girls........ *dancing* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawken Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 I honestly do not even care. My only wish to to have plenty money, because when you do, nobody cares and all labels fall away. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MENA Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 2 hours ago, Matty said: Wow..... Wow.... *hugs* Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bluelion Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 2 hours ago, Hawken said: I honestly do not even care. My only wish is to have plenty money, because when you do, nobody cares and all labels fall away. Exactly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChazBee Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 On 14/11/2017 at 12:09 PM, MENA said: For me what l have come to understand over the years, is that you are just who you are. Is either you stop acting on your feelings but does not make you straight bcos within you, you know you are still very much attracted to girls. like my story, l fell in love with a woman who could pass for a mother to me. We lived together for like 10yrs, the first six years we were fully dating and the other four years the relationship was just mutual. The reason why,families and church pressure. so she pleased that we should stop and we have to pray about it to over our feelings for each. lt was a very tough struggle but somehow we did over came it. So at a time l thought, l was straight but still l couldn't date a guy. So what l did, was to have a long distance relationship bcos l couldn't stand a guy being on my neck. Then came the family and church pressure to get married being the first daughter of my mom, who had just two girls. My younger sister was already married. So after so pressure from my woman, bcos she always felt like people are feeling is her that is keeping me from settling down and l was over due. So l decided to settle and l got married to a child hood friend who has always been on my case and he's based abroad. The only reason why l decided to marry him, was because he is based abroad and we had this understanding that l will not relocate, within me, l needed my space. So the marriage was done glamorously, it was like a carnival. My woman sponsored it all to make me happy and escorted me with a fourteen sitter bus filled with all sort of gifts that will make a woman comfortable in marriage and my family was well pleased. Then three months passed and the marriage ended. The guy was a torn in my flesh , he makes trouble over every pin and the mother will not let me be. We got separated. As God will have, l took in the first month. when my child was old enough, l gifted every single thing l had out that has to do with that marriage. SO l relocated to get away from unnecessarily family issues. l have nothing for now for a start but l discovered this genuine peace of mind and am very happy even though l don't have much for now. And l also discovered l genuinely LOVE GIRLS , there is no other way to it, is just who you are. People are surprised at the easy l took the break up, but the truth is, bcos l just love girls. ls true Nigeria is homophobia , but the thing is that you don't have to front your relationships in public. Even the straight people don't go kissing in public in Nigeria , so why should l? This Nigeria! @MENA,your story broke my heart but sounds like something I can do. I can't wait to find my feet financially and then have a baby of my own and gave the world. I don't care what the world gives me as long as I can afford my needs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mimy Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 3 hours ago, Hawken said: I honestly do not even care. My only wish to to have plenty money, because when you do, nobody cares and all labels fall away. This right here is what matters. With enough money you can screw whom ever you like in peace without fear of mob action. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suavity Posted November 16, 2017 Share Posted November 16, 2017 3 hours ago, Hawken said: I honestly do not even care. My only wish to to have plenty money, because when you do, nobody cares and all labels fall away. Gbam! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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