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Warning! Graphic description of sex between consenting adults up ahead. *DO NOT COMMENT* PLEASE DO NOT COMMENT O.. As usual, you can click the link on my signature and ask me anything.

25nd April 2013 Doc is becoming pettier by the day. Yesterday, she had overheard me compliment a colleague’s makeup in the hallway. Today I noticed she had gone a step further than lipstick. Her eyebrows were plucked and defined, she had a little powder on and some blush. “Makeup looks very good on you,” I said when had time to ourselves. “Really?” She asked looking up at me. I could see how pleased she was. I wanted to hold her. I wish I could make her look that way everyday for the rest of her life. I love this woman! “Yes. You look very beautiful; your facial features are perfect. By the time you become a makeup pro, you will make men drive into each other if you decide to take a stroll”. “What about you?” she asked, “will I make you drive into anyone?” I looked her over and smiled. 4th May 2013 I woke up to the beep of my phone this morning. That was some six minutes past Nine. It was Doc. “Ego, do you have any plans for today? The Wii system I ordered just came in. I need to try it out with someone”. What the hell is a Wii system? I did not bother asking. Doc wants me in her house. That’s the message. I got her address and rushed into the bathroom. Wii turned out to be a game console complete with VR video games for fitness. She wanted us to do the dance revolution. My first proper date! Dear diary, I am not a fan of rigorous dance, but I really had fun today. I watched her every time she faulted in any particular dance move, how she would throw her head back and laugh. Sometimes she held me to keep from tripping and when I had more points, she feigned annoyance. To me, relationships always started and ended with sex. This feels different. I've never felt this way before. After about 45 minutes of dancing and sweating, we were exhausted. I had my bath and changed into some cloths she had laid out while she heated up some leftover food for brunch. When I was done getting dressed, she got in the shower as I looked through some books in her impressive bookcase. I like that she is a vast reader. It was a while before I realised the shower had stopped running. I looked up and there she was, the woman of my dreams standing in all her glory. “The things a warm bath can do to your muscles,” she said as she walked across the room to sit on the edge of her bed. “Amazing, but not as amazing as an actual kneading would be.” I smiled in agreement. I refused to take a cue. “Well, I am sure you know one or two things about massaging,” Doc urged on. I was scared that if I moved, the wetness between my legs would be like a woman whose water broke. Somehow, I got to the bed. She lay face down and I shifted the towel to her lower back and began to knead that perfect body. She didn’t stifle her moans. The sound was beautiful to my ears. The towel was not there anymore, I do not know how. I only know that touching those beautiful legs almost brought tears to my eyes. Doc turned around to lie on her back and pulled me down to a warm kiss. My hand strayed to her breast. They were fuller than I had imagined. I played with her nipples and finally took one in my mouth. She let out a gasp, then a whimper that spurred me on. I kiss her as my hands found the paradise between her legs. Such wetness. I wondered what she would taste like. I got off Doc and positioned myself between her legs. I caressed every part of her bud, admiring the rich contrast between her dark skin and her pink inner labia. I wanted to feel that p**sy on mine, but I didn’t think she was ready for all that. It was not about me today. With my lips covered her clitoris, she gave another whimper and held my head, muttering sweet nothings. I like to watch the contracting of a vagina during orgasm. When I noticed she was getting there, I pulled out my head from her grasp and continued with my finger, pulling the labia covering the clit back with my left hand, I worked with the right index finger and watched until she came. It was beautiful; I don’t know which was more, the expression on her face or her pulsating vagina. I kissed her bud then her inner thighs until they didn't tremble any more. We've been all over each other the whole day. As I write this, I watch her sleep. I know I am in trouble. Eventually, the reality of our society dawns on us. It always does. I can't be selfish. I would let her remarry if she wanted and have a family. We might still be lovers, but I know I will always be second place. I am real big trouble, one I do not regret.

20th April 2013 07:35 PM I’d rather spend my Saturday morning sleeping and listening to music when I am not working. That is not going to be the case today. Today is the office getaway. 11:00 PM Welfare committee had settled for a dinner party. Fine by me. I did not have a date, my best friend Emeka had his girlfriend over for the weekend and so I could not invite him to be my date. Luckily for me, Cynthia my bosses secretary did not have a date either so we were stuck with each other the rest of the evening. I overheard the office gossips saying Doc has never attended any of such outings. This is exactly why I was surprised to see her in the hall. I went over with the secretary to briefly say hello to my HOD. We didn’t talk much in public. She preferred to keep our closeness away from prying eyes of colleagues. She still preferred to be seen as the bad cop director who did not fraternize with employees. I had no issues with that. Her response was curt. Part of the act I guess. 22nd April 2013 I did not expect what I was confronted with at work today. When I opened my HOD’s door, her eyes were a blazing furnace. “Is it really?” was her reply to my Good morning. “Of all people to pick as your date and flirt the whole evening away with, my secretary? How could you? It did not even bother you that I was right there!” I was taken aback for a minute. So that was it. The curt reply was not the act I felt it was. If I did not know better, I would say it was lovers quarrel. “Are you that randy? You didn’t even care that I was right there!” she continued in an angry muffled voice. “Really Doc? Really? What on earth is so wrong about conversing with another girl who like me did not have a date for the evening? Are you really going to be jealous over something like that?” “Oh pls Ego! You cannot really think I am jealous. I cannot be bothered about what you do with your life. f***k every girl in the office. Just don’t let it interfere with your work!” She had regained a little composure and assumed her regal posture behind her desk. I braced off for a wave of dismissal, none came. We proceeded to work. We were having clients over by 1 pm. Halfway into the discussion there was another muffled outburst, “Is that how easily you move on?” She ignored my pleading gaze and countenance. By now, I was sure it was a very intense lover’s fight. “So what I said I am not into women? could you not at least respect me and not rub any girl in my face for up to three months?” … “It’s not as if I care, or as if anything will ever happen between us, but I expect some level of mutual respect.” I wanted to shut her up with a kiss, but I was not about to make up her mind for her. I know what is happening. The internal conflict going on within her; being from a very religious background. The denial of being attracted to me, the denial of being jealous, the denial of loving a woman. I will not make up her mind for her with a kiss. That is the easy way out. I will let her go through the stages of self-realisation up to the point of acceptance. And even after that, I will give her a little more time to realise that this is a turn of a lifetime.

14th May 2013 My mind is playing strange tricks on me. I went to bed last night thinking of when last I kissed a girl. I thought of trying out every single colour in the lipstick set on Doc. Kissing each off before I tried on the next. I fantasized about different flavours off her lips: vanilla, chocolate, honey... I rebuked such thoughts from my mind as I remembered my promise to my mother. Never to give in to the works of the devil. Sigh! Ever since mum found out that I am a lesbian, it has been one emotional blackmail after the other. One prayer house after the other. I got physically and mentally exhausted, I caved in and admitted to being delivered. I even gave a testimony in our close knit prayer group. I was celebrated. I have never been as depressed as I was that period. She blamed my father for sending me to school in the UK. She would always end up with, “they come back with all sorts of nonsense!”. I didn’t bother telling her that I already had all sorts of nonsense before I left for the UK. If providence has decided that UK will take the blame, who am I to say otherwise? When I saw Doc at work today, my heart skipped a beat. I stuttered when she asked me a question. For the first time I truly looked at her. She had on a dress made of blue Ankara gown and matching hijab. Was that silk? I don’t know. I am not good at recognising materials. She should be 5’5” ? Dark skinned. Under her dress and Hijab, I could see tell-tale signs of voluminous breasts. The way her dress flared at her hips was indication that Doc is a well endowed woman. Dr. Fauziya Adam is a beautiful woman who seemed oblivious of the fact that she is beautiful. *** 15th May 2013 I woke up today feeling very elated. I had slept off last night fantasizing about my HOD. I had flash fantasies of her longs legs flying around in the air as she pleaded with me never to do to another woman the things I do to her. I want her. I am going to have her. I made fruit salad this morning. There was something different about this one. Don’t ask me what Diary, I will come to that. Okay, what the heck! I took it to work today. I always feel bold until I get to her door. “What is this Miss Ego?" she asked when I brought out the flask from the bag in which I brought it to work and presented it to my Muse. “It is nothing serious Doc. Just fruit salad.” “What on earth? Did nobody tell you that we aren’t running a kitchen here? This is an office….” “Where living humans work, where every one has lunch but you!” I interrupted. She gave me a shocked look. “This should be the last time you cut in when I am speaking. Is that clear?” she said in a calm voice that would have sent chills down anyones spine. “Most definitely Doc. Please accept my most sincere apologies. Its just that you look exhausted by the time its close of work. I felt you do not have to work so hard and eat only twice a day assuming you have breakfast. I will make sure this doesn’t happen again.” She gave the wave of dismissal and despite my burning anger and humiliation, I couldn’t help but to admire her dainty fingers. Oh well, I refuse to lose my job over a piece of fine ass. I give up! I was about to turn the door knob when I heard something that made my skip several beats. “Let me see what you made.” 1st April 2013 Believe anything I tell you today. Happy April Fools day. These past weeks, I doubled up as chef and dietitian. I now take the lunch packs to Doc during her break time. We discuss work as she eats. Still the professional. No second is to be wasted. If she were a man, it could have easily been branded office romance by anyone observing. In between work discussions, personal conversations began to creep in. Few days back, I got to find out that one of her greatest fears was being overweight. I didn’t see the sense in that. A few here and there would actually look good on her. But then, who am I to question Milady’s desires? That’s how I became a dietitian. Today, I got to know about her divorce after being married to a much older man at the bequest of her parents. I wanted to know why an educated and accomplished woman as Doc would let that happen to her. She shrugged. Maybe its time for that bold step. As she ate today, I stared. I could not talk. How do you know what to say to a woman like this? Probably up to twelve years my senior at age and at the Bar. Freaking cat got my tongue. “You seem quiet. What is the problem?” her beautiful eyes where searching. “Trouble at home?” “No. Its just, how is a beautiful woman like you single” Jeez, that was lame. Of all things to say. Time stood still. “You think I am beautiful?” “You are almost ethereal. I am scared to touch you, thinking you will disappear. If I asked to touch your face, would you deem that unprofessional?” She stared at me for a while, “I am not into women.” "I have noticed how you gaze at me, all the attention you gave me, but I just did not want to make assumptions". “That’s all right Doc. I am very sorry about my behaviour.” She still had that calm look. “So this is what all this has been all about? You caring about my health blah blah blah!” My heart sank. “Just because you wanted some lesbian action.” “I am sorry you feel this way Doc. I didn’t ever imagine being that way with you.” (I know that’s a lie but I cannot help it now) “I only wanted you to know that I care very deeply for you, I might be a lesbian but it has all been platonic to me.” Goodness! I am blabbing. “you are not even afraid,” she went on. “This is Nigeria! It did not cross your mind that this could affect your job? That I could be homophobic?” “I am very sorry Ma” “Don’t call me that!” “I am sorry Doc. Please excuse me. Your break time is over. If this is going to affect my job, I would not be as bothered as I would be about it affecting our friendship. If you can, forget this ever happened and we can go back to being friends. If the lunch I bring now disgusts you now, I will put an end to it.” “Now that is so rude!” she was pacing already. She sat down and gave the wave of dismissal. Its been ages. I deserve it.

7th May 2013 As I got ready for work and packed my lunch for today, I kept muttering a prayer to God to see me through the day, and the remaining four months before I leave for studies in Witwatersrand, SA. The moment I sorted out my table, my next port of call was my HOD. I knocked softly on her door and stepped in. As usual, she leafed through sheets of documents as I answered questions she had about the department and our correspondence with other departments. I looked at her lips, no lipstick. She doesn’t use them! I nearly boxed myself. When she was done, I got my little packet from where it was hidden under my files and said, “happy birthday Doc”. “What’s that?” finally an eye contact. “Just a gift, I heard it’s your birthday today.” “Oh! I see, did nobody tell you that we do not do this here?” “I was told Doc, I was just passing by the gift shop in my neighbourhood and spotted it on display.” She gave me a look, I don’t know what it was. “Thank you, drop it in that bag over there”. “Make sure I leave today with the report you are working on.” 13th May 2013 Today was a beautiful day at work. I made a discovery. Dr. Fauziya has a human side! And she really does know how to play the hostess. Our partners visited from Canada. I discovered one had been her research partner during her doctorate. We really saw a different her. For the first time she had lipstick on. She had chosen the Silky Mauve. It looked so good on her. I was pleased it didn’t end up in the trashcan. She laughed a lot today. Her eyes had a sparkle I never knew was there.

6th May 2013 The last time I made an entry about Doc is the first day I met her. After the thorough conversation in her office by 3pm, I was grateful she wasn’t on the panel that conducted my interview. My first two months on the job was smooth and fortunately uneventful. Fortunately? Well... Doc has been away on a Consulting trip to Eastern Nigeria for the most of it. I closed two contracts. They were easy ones that didn’t require any travelling. At closing time each day, it is the norm to have a phone meeting with Dr. Fauziya to keep her updated on on-goings in the office. In between polite and professional emails, there were not so nice phone calls that never failed to mentally exhaust me. Is there no pleasing this woman? I am beginning to understand why the last occupant of my position resigned. Office gossips would jokingly ask, "them done baptise you?" I always feign ignorance at the genuine purpose of that question. My response has always been a blank and confused look and then to ask in an innocent voice what do you mean? They would snicker and find something else to talk about. I really do not want to join a clique of snickering office gossips in this new place. Yes, I have been baptised. Over and over again! Words like daft and incompetent have become rather reoccurrent in our conversations and nothing is ever good enough. Today, she summoned a tornado because I had used my discretion on a decision without asking her. It was urgent, I could not reach her. The notice of vacancy had said 'ability to think outside the box and work with minimal or no supervision'. In the end it turned out she didn’t have an alternative. She would have done the same thing. The word insubordination got thrown around a lot. And then there was a threat of query and suspension in the event of a reoccurrence. I have a throbbing migraine. I hope I can get some sleep tonight. I dread tomorrow. It is going to be her first day at work in two months. It’s also her birthday. HR had called a meeting the day before. There was to be a cake presented by the welfare committee. No other person but the welfare committee and other Directors as much as breathed happy birthday. To Doc that would be highly unprofessional; spending precious office hours on birthday wishes. Well, I did something today. I don’t know why I did it. I had a lipstick set wrapped in a gift shop on my way back from work. I decided one of those expensive little boxes with music, and a blue wrap finished with a pink ribbon. I feel silly. It is a birthday gift for Doc. It is a set of five lipsticks. Mixture of different brands. Chestnut brown in L’Oreal, dusty lilac in Maybelline, silky mauve in CoverGirl, a soft metallic color in Urban Decay and sandy peach in Generation G. Silly choice. I should have added one bold color. Well, Doc does not look the type for vampie-lips. It cost a little Fortune. I hope she appreciates that at my level this is a lot. I’ve never noticed lipstick on her. I am not a member of the welfare committee. Why the hell did I do this?

I am really shy about putting out my LGBT themed fiction. I am more comfortable putting my research work on LBGT Rights out there. Since this is a closed forum of like minds. I'm gonna do this. This is a daily freestyle for as long as it lasts. Edits are embraced. Here goes. 4th Mar. 2013 This is my Sixth day of work as an Associate In-House Counsel in Alakah Consulting Limited. I resumed work on the 25th day of February with a training that lasted through the week. I met the Head of my Department and one of the Directors of the firm Dr. Fauziya Adam for the first time today. She is just fresh from an official assignment. The moment I stepped into her office, it dawned on me that working with her would require a lot of tact. She seems to be everything I heard she is in the office cafeteria (where more gossiping than eating goes on). No smile. Permanent scowl that throws you off balance. Harsh tone. Fault finder. “You are the new one,” she said to me as she leafed through some filed documents never looking up the duration of the conversation. “Yes Doc,” I had been told it is important to call her that. “I see.” Leaf. Leaf. “I hope you really are as impressive as your CV says.” Leaf. Leaf. Leaf. “I try my best Doc.” “Well, we will have serious issues if your best is not good enough,” she said with a wave of dismissal. “Come back by 3, let me pick your brain and know how you plan to make this work.” “Thank you, Doc,” I said as I took my leave. My best is always good enough. I thought of the other job offer I had pending. I had two weeks to send in my acceptance letter. I was not too excited at the prospect because I have never been a fan of Government Ministries. Mum thinks they are the best in terms of getting paid whatever your output, and then there is the issue of job security. That’s not what I need. I have to leave Nigeria to Pretoria, SA to start my Doctorate degree in seven months. I had deferred my admission from the previous year because funds were not forthcoming. I need money and Alakar Consulting pays enough to give me a soft landing; I am not going to let anyone ruin this for me.