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Ellen welcomed Sarah and her fiancée Kate, whose photo of her proposing at the Eiffel Tower went viral. Since Kate’s parents do not accept that she’s gay, they will not be attending her wedding, so she took to Twitter to help get Ellen to walk her down the aisle. The couple talked about their story, and Ellen surprised them with a wedding gift from Shutterfly and a visit from their family and friends, and Sarah shocked Kate by proposing to her on the show!

Nigerian gay rights activist Pamela Adie has revealed she was once a side chic to a guy. According to Pamela who, years before she came out as a lesbian, she was the side chic to a guy who is now married with kids to the main chick. In her words: ”On another note, when I thought I was straight, I was a side-chick to one guy back in college. Sometimes the main chic would call right after we just finished nacking and he’d be telling her how much he loved her…lol. It was funny sha. They’re married now…with kids.” Source

Orlando Pride and U.S. Women’s National Team goalkeeper Ashlyn Harris and defender Ali Krieger are one of sport’s most beloved couples. They first met in 2010 at USWNT training camp, where they became fast friends. “I just found her to be so captivating and always wanted to be around her,” Ali says. “She’s someone who seemed so confident and comfortable with herself, and I was so attracted to that.” The two began a romantic relationship, which they kept secret for a long time out of fear of losing endorsement deals, despite the fact that hardcore soccer fans suspected they were a couple long before they ultimately decided to go public. After almost 10 years of dating, they tied the knot over the holidays in a wedding that was a non-stop, weekend-long party and served as a reunion for many of the USWNT team members. It also capped off a World Cup winning season in which these athletes made front-page headlines for their powerful stances off the field as well as their talent on it. Ashlyn and Ali’s official move toward marriage started when Ashlyn asked Ali to marry her in Clearwater, Florida. They were enjoying a weekend away after a long season. Just before dinner, “we headed down to the beach to watch the sunset and take in the beautiful scenery,” Ali remembers. “We had a glass of champagne and then wanted to take photos to capture the moment. I proceeded to take a selfie and Ashlyn’s arm was in the back of the photo. I asked her to put it down and stop being silly, only to realize she had actually been holding the engagement ring the entire time I had been snapping photos. She pulled it around in front of me, and then asked the big question! I was in shock but so happy and excited at the same time. It was an incredible sunset, and just a perfect moment.” Wedding planning kicked off soon after. From the start, the goal was to create a classic, clean environment. “Vizcaya Museum and Gardens [in Miami] is this kind of Mediterranean Castle-like vibe right on the water,” Ali says. “It has this European feel that we were going for, so right when we walked into the venue for the first time, we were like, ‘Oh my God! It’s breathtaking. This is it!’” The couple worked with Sara Lowell from Sara Renee Events to bring their vision to life. “She’s so badass and beautiful and just absolutely crushed it for us,” Ali says. “We’re so grateful for her and her incredible team of fantastic people working to make our dreams a reality.” “Ali and I really wanted to align ourselves with people and brands that spoke to our soul and were really about nonconforming and understood the same vision we were going for,” Ashlyn adds. “I just wanted to feel like we could fully express ourselves, our sexuality, and our community.” To that end, Ashlyn wore Thom Browne, the designer she turns to for all of her red carpet events, and a TAG Heuer Monaco watch. Thom Browne dresses the Barcelona soccer team, which is how Ashlyn first became acquainted with the brand. “Honestly, I love that it’s all very gender neutral, very fluid, there are women in dresses and men in dress, and men and women in skirts. I can really feel how he expresses himself through clothes. It’s just so nonconforming and so far out. I’ve been wearing his stuff ever since.” She and the Thom Browne team created a custom tuxedo with a beaded argyle pattern for the wedding day. Like a lot of brides on the hunt for the right dress, Ali took a weekend trip to New York City with her best friend and maid of honor, Elizabeth Mumley, to search for her wedding gown. They found a Pronovias fit and flare dress with long sleeves and a V in the back that was exactly what she wanted. “I tried it on, and I knew it was the one!” she says of the “Helio” gown. “I fell in love and knew I would get married in this dress. It’s simple but sophisticated and elegant at the same time. I have personally always loved Pronovias. It’s a brand with which I think I share a lot of values as they believe in inclusivity and diversity.” On Saturday, December 28, just three days after Christmas, the couple married in the round so that friends and family could see the ceremony and feel part of it. “We wanted simple white flowers and a rose-petal-strewn aisle,” Ali says. “We also wanted to walk ourselves down the aisle as strong, confident, independent women. We felt like it was right.” Ashlyn’s best friend, USWNT team captain and the World Cup’s MVP, Megan Rapinoe, served as maid of honor; Ali’s brother, Kyle Krieger, was best man; and Orlando Pride player Sydney Leroux was the officiant. For the reception afterward, guests found their seats at tables named after LGBTQ icons including Marsha P. Johnson—a pioneering activist known for her role in the Stonewall uprising—and Anderson Cooper. Dena Lowell Blauschild and The Cook and the Cork catered a colorful menu with an incredible attention to detail. And just before the party really got started, Ali changed into the Condesa dress, also by Pronovias. “I wanted to make it into a mini dress but keep the train, so I customized the hem to give it a high-low effect,” she says. “It was very nice to be able to dance without worrying!” Meanwhile, Ashlyn seemed to strip off components of her wedding ensemble as the night went on—her pants were switched out for shorts and her tuxedo jacket was traded in for a sleeveless shirt and vest, also by Thom Browne, which allowed her to dance more freely. The newlyweds cut their rainbow cake and did their first dance to a live, acoustic version of Kina Grannis’s “Stand by Me.” Toasts were given over the course of the evening, with Ali’s brother Kyle voicing the sentiments so many there (and those taking in the festivities from afar via Instagram) were feeling: “Since you went public with your relationship, it has been a gift to watch you grow together. It’s amazing because you guys are like a beacon of light for all young queer LGBTQ women and men who just need someone to look up to, like we get happy endings too. In the media and the movies, so often...you know, queer stories have a devastating ending, but not here. In real life, we get to see you guys live the dream.” Source

Honey has been reported to have an inhibitory effect on around 60 species of bacteria, some species of fungi and viruses The benefits are explained below: Healthy sweetener: It can be used as a substitute for sugar in many foods and drinks. It contains about 69 per cent glucose and fructose, enabling it to be used as a sweetener which is far better for one’s overall health than normal white sugar. Weight loss: Though it has more calories than sugar, honey helps in digesting the fat stored in one’s body. Similarly, honey with lemon juice or cinnamon helps in reducing weight. Provides relief for cough: In 2012, a research was conducted on 300 children of age one to five years to find out the effect of honey on nocturnal cough and sleep quality. The results published in the Pediatrics Journals showed that honey could be a preferable treatment for a cough and sleep difficulty associated with childhood upper respiratory tract infections. Boosts energy: According to the USDA, honey contains about 64 calories per tablespoon ; therefore, it is used by many people as a source of energy. Furthermore, the carbohydrates in it can be easily converted into glucose since it is simple for the body to digest this pure and natural substance. Improves performance: Research has shown that honey is effective in boosting an athlete’s performance. It is a great way to maintain blood sugar levels, recuperate muscles, and restore glycogen after a workout. Improves memory: Honey contains polyphenols that can significantly improve the memory-related functions of the brain. It counters deficits in recall functions and induces memory formation at the molecular level. It is this modulation of neural circuitry that helps in improving memory. Research on Tualang honey, multi-floral honey found in Malaysia, showed that its intake improves the brain morphology to improve various learning and memory functions. Rich in vitamins and minerals: It contains a variety of vitamins and minerals. The type of vitamins, minerals and their quantity depend on the type of flowers used for apiculture. Commonly, honey contains vitamin C, calcium, and iron. Antiseptic property: It has anti-bacterial and anti-fungal properties, so it is often used as a natural antiseptic in traditional medicines. In-vitro tests on different medical-grade honeys showed potent bactericidal activity even in the presence of antibiotic-resistant bacteria that cause life-threatening infections in humans. However, the antimicrobial activity depends on the source of nectar. Antioxidant properties: It contains nutraceuticals highly effective for the removal of free radicals from the body. As a result, one’s body immunity is improved against many chronic health conditions. A study on the antioxidant properties of honey, published in the Journal of Agricultural and Food Chemistry, attributed these qualities to the presence of a wide range of compounds, which include phenolics, peptides, Maillard reaction products, organic acids, enzymes, and other minor components. Anticancer properties: A review published in the journal Evidence-Based Complementary and Alternative Medicine found that there is growing evidence of honey’s anticancer potential. This is displayed by its antiproliferative, apoptosis, antimutagenic and anti-inflammatory properties. However, the floral source also decides its properties. Another article published in the same journal pointed out that as a natural substance, honey is a sustainable and low-cost option in cancer care in developing nations. Skin and hair care: Milk and honey are often served together since both of these ingredients help in creating smooth, beautiful skin. Consuming this combination every morning is a common practice in many countries for this reason. A study published in the European Journal of Medical Research investigated and confirmed the use of honey for dandruff and dermatitis. It said that crude honey could markedly improve seborrheic dermatitis, its associated hair loss and prevent relapse when applied weekly. Speeds wound healing: Significant research is being carried out to study its benefits in the treatment of wounds. These have been listed below: honey possesses antimicrobial properties, helps in promoting autolytic debridement and deodorises malodorous wounds. It also speeds up the healing process by stimulating wound tissues and helps in initiating the healing process in dormant wounds. These healing powers are not overstated. The Waikato Honey Research Unit provides details about the worldwide research being carried out on the benefits of honey in medicine. According to a British Broadcasting Corporation report ; doctors at the Christie Hospital in Didsbury, Manchester are planning to use it for faster recovery of cancer patients after surgery. Such research will provide scientific evidence for the beliefs held by honey lovers all over the world and will help in propagating the benefits to more people. The Russians used honey in World War I to prevent wound infection and to accelerate wound healing. The Germans combined cod liver oil and honey to treat ulcers, burns, fistulas and boils . Nearly all types of wounds like abrasion, abscess, amputation, bed sores /decubitus ulcers, burns, chill blains, burst abdominal wound, cracked nipples, fistulas, diabetic, malignant, leprosy, traumatic, cervical, varicose and sickle cell ulcers, septic wounds, surgical wound or wounds of abdominal wall and perineum are found to be responsive to honey therapy. Application of honey as wound dressing leads to stimulation of healing process and rapidly clears the infection. Honey has cleansing action on wounds, stimulates tissue regeneration and reduces inflammation. Honey impregnated pads act as non-adhesive tissue dressing . Opthalmology and honey Honey is used worldwide for the treatment of various ophthalmological conditions like blepharitis, keratitis, conjunctivitis, corneal injuries, chemical and thermal burns to the eyes . In one study, with topical application of honey as ointment, in 102 patients with non responsive eye disorders, improvement was seen in 85 per cent patients and in the remaining 15 per cent there was no disease progression. Application of honey in infective conjunctivitis reduced redness, swelling, pus discharge and time to bacterial eradication. Helps for digestive issues Honey is sometimes used to treat digestive issues such as diarrhoea, though there is not much research to show that it works. It is proven to be effective as a treatment for Helicobacter pylori (H. pylori) bacteria, a common cause of stomach ulcers. It is also a potent prebiotic. Prebiotics are a special form of dietary fiber that acts as a fertiliser for the good bacteria in your gut. Soothes sore throat Have a cold? Try a spoonful of honey. Honey is an old sore throat remedy. Add it to hot tea with lemon when a cold virus hits you. It also works as a cough suppressant. Research has suggested that honey is as effective as dextromethorphan, a common ingredient in over-the-counter cough medication. Just take one or two teaspoonfuls of honey straight. Antiviral effect of honey In addition to antibacterial and antifungal effects, natural honey has showed antiviral effect. Al-Waili (2004) investigated the effect of the topical application of honey on recurrent attacks of herpes lesions and concluded that topical honey application was safe and effective in the management of the signs and symptoms of recurrent lesions from labial and genital herpes compared to acyclovir cream. Honey has also been reported to have inhibitory effects on rubella virus activity . Prevents acid reflux Research has shown that honey can reduce the upward flow of stomach acid and undigested food by lining the esophagus and stomach. This has helped to reduce the risk of gastroesophageal reflux disease. GERD can cause inflammation, acid reflux, and heartburn. Now that you know the benefits of honey, how do you eat it? You can eat it raw, add it to water or different beverages, and you can also add it to several recipes. Honey is natural and considered harmless for adults. But pediatricians strongly caution against feeding honey to children under one year old.This is because of the risk of botulism. The spores of the botulism bacteria are found in dust and soil that may make their way into honey. According to Jatinder Bhatia , MD , a Georgia neonatologist who heads the American Academy of Pediatrics’ Committee on Nutrition, infants do not have a developed immune system to defend against infection. For diabetics, they should consult their doctors before including honey in their diets. The major problem is how to get pure honey; most of the honey you find in grocery stores are pasteurised. Many of the beneficial nutrients are destroyed in the process. If you are interested in trying raw honey, buy it from a trusted local producer. Source

Many Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer [LGBTQ] Nigerians choose to remain in the closet mostly because of homophobia and the fear of rejection. However, some get tired of hiding their sexuality and decide to come out to family and friends. But often, many face rejection; while a few are lucky to have supportive families. But Bryan could be considered as one of the brave ones who choose to live their true and authentic life regardless of the possible negative outcome. In a recent chat conversation on Whatsapp, Bryan, a Lagos-based Nigerian youth decided to open up to his brother about his sexuality but was shocked at the response that he received. Source

No fewer than 15 homosexuals were arrested in Kano during a party they allegedly organised last Thursday. It was gathered the Sharia law enforcement operatives stormed an event centre,along Ahmadu Bello way and a compound located at Sabuwar-Gandu quarters in Kano metropolis and apprehended the gays. The arrest took place before the planned party took off. The Nation learnt that the organisers of the party were new graduands who planned the party to celebrate their graduation from the “institution”. It was learnt each of them was said to have invited their same sex partners to the party. The DCG, Special Duties,Muhammadu Anbakary,who confirmed the arrest of the suspected same sex party organizers,said 15 of them are in custody. He added over 50 gays were involved, but many of the suspects fled during the operation. He said the operation was based on intelligence reports gathered by Hisbah operatives. He said the suspects arrested by Hisbah are currently undergoing reorientation programmes. Source

A recent study led by researchers from the National University of Singapore (NUS) revealed that regular tea drinkers have better organised brain regions -- and this is associated with healthy cognitive function -- compared to non-tea drinkers. The research team made this discovery after examining neuroimaging data of 36 older adults. "Our results offer the first evidence of positive contribution of tea drinking to brain structure, and suggest that drinking tea regularly has a protective effect against age-related decline in brain organisation," explained team leader Assistant Professor Feng Lei, who is from the Department of Psychological Medicine at the NUS Yong Loo Lin School of Medicine. The research was carried out together with collaborators from the University of Essex and University of Cambridge, and the findings were published in scientific journal Aging on 14 June 2019. Benefits of regular intake of tea Past studies have demonstrated that tea intake is beneficial to human health, and the positive effects include mood improvement and cardiovascular disease prevention. In fact, results of a longitudinal study led by Asst Prof Feng which was published in 2017 showed that daily consumption of tea can reduce the risk of cognitive decline in older persons by 50 per cent. Following this discovery, Asst Prof Feng and his team further explored the direct effect of tea on brain networks. The research team recruited 36 adults aged 60 and above, and gathered data about their health, lifestyle, and psychological well-being. The elderly participants also had to undergo neuropsychological tests and magnetic resonance imaging (MRI). The study was carried out from 2015 to 2018. Upon analysing the participants' cognitive performance and imaging results, the research team found that individuals who consumed either green tea, oolong tea, or black tea at least four times a week for about 25 years had brain regions that were interconnected in a more efficient way. "Take the analogy of road traffic as an example -- consider brain regions as destinations, while the connections between brain regions are roads. When a road system is better organised, the movement of vehicles and passengers is more efficient and uses less resources. Similarly, when the connections between brain regions are more structured, information processing can be performed more efficiently," explained Asst Prof Feng. He added, "We have shown in our previous studies that tea drinkers had better cognitive function as compared to non-tea drinkers. Our current results relating to brain network indirectly support our previous findings by showing that the positive effects of regular tea drinking are the result of improved brain organisation brought about by preventing disruption to interregional connections." Source

Versatile, simple, and almost everyone has one: bullet vibrators are essentially the little black dress of the sex toy world. I understand the temptation to just use them as you think you should: pressed right up against your clit until you orgasm, before popping out to the kitchen to make yourself a coffee, but there’s the potential to do so much more. Here are some tips on how to have sex using a bullet vibrator, that’'ll hopefully show you that this unassuming sex toy can be the gateway to a new world of possibilities. Test out the different areas of your clit Sure, it’s small on the surface, but you’d be surprised just how much variation there is in your clit, and in what happens where. If you’re used to manual masturbation, you might not be familiar with the level of precision you can achieve with a good bullet vibrator. A great bullet vibrator allows you to pinpoint exactly where you want the vibrations to be. Some people report that a particular side of their clit is more sensitive, while others prefer to stimulate somewhere just above or below it. If you’re especially sensitive, or you’re packing a bullet vibe that has a lot of power – you can also try using it outside the labia; by covering the clit, the vibrations are dulled slightly, which gives you a slower build up to orgasm. As an added bonus, the more you experiment with your technique, the better you’ll be at directing someone else if you want to use your bullet while shagging. Which is handy, and means you get to play the sexy teacher giving them a crash-course in how best to make you come. You don’t always have to go straight to orgasm I’ve heard of ‘edging’ mentioned far more frequently in relation to guys having a wank than girls, and I think that’s a shame. Edging is the practice of bringing yourself close to the ‘edge’ of orgasm, but not quite tipping yourself over it. Then you have a brief break, get back to it, reach the edge again, and keep doing this until you build to a state of super-heightened arousal, where literally any time you touch yourself you think you’re going to explode. Fun, right? Obviously. Edging can be one of the most delightful ways to kill an hour or so, and a bullet vibrator makes this so much easier, because you’re not having to worry that you’ll get hand-cramp halfway through and have to give the whole thing up and go sit on a washing machine or something. Use your bullet vibrator to bring yourself to the edge, then repeat and repeat until you can’t repeat any more. Especially useful when you’ve got a night in lined up and you’ve got no decent box sets to watch on Netflix. Examine the bullet vibrator pulse settings Back in the day most vibrators came with a selection of speeds from ‘rubbish and weak’ to ‘buzzes like a horde of angry bees’. These days the tech has moved on, and a decent bullet vibrator will come with a selection of different pulse settings. Like your phone when it rings on silent, but in a whole variety of different patterns. I was initially sceptical of these settings, because why on Earth would I want something to go‘on/off/on/off’ when instead it could be permanently jammed against my clit, and shoved ‘on’ to the highest setting? It turns out they’re bloody excellent, though. Like a meal which comes with salad so you appreciate the chips more, pulse settings give you a bit of a contrast. It’s essentially a clitoral massage, and exploring these massage settings means even more excuses to lock yourself in your bedroom with some loud music and a hard-drive full of porn. Use a bullet vibrator during sex I shouldn’t need to mention this, should I? OK, I should, and I will. Because after Nicki Minaj’s fierce and righteous proclamation that she demands orgasms from sex, we need to mention the fact that most people with clits find it easier to come clitorally than they do from penetrative sex. Given this, if you love your bullet vibrator and you struggle to come during penetrative sex, then for God’s sake please say so – it’ll help us challenge the myth that everyone wants exactly the same kind of sex, and introduce more people to the range of sexual variety that exists within different human bodies. By this point you should have a good idea of exactly the kind of setting you like, and know exactly the right place to put it. Show your partner, lie back, and enjoy a clitoral orgasm that both of you get to take part in. If your other half is reluctant, let them know that when you come, the muscles in your vagina are likely to twitch and spasm in a way that feels like a top-class milking machine. There are plenty of other ways to use a bullet vibrator during sex, of course – if you’d rather be in control, then placing it between you and your partner when you’re on top means you can do that fun tribbin thing. Use a bullet vibrator on things other than your clit Obviously, the clit is the place it’s most likely to give you an orgasm. Feel free to ease your partner into it by using the bullet on their sensitive bits: nipples, clit, labia minora, labia majoria, and the vagina. Basically, anywhere with nerve endings can be stimulated, and as long as it’s somewhere on the outside of your body (never ever stick a bullet vibe up your arse), it’s perfectly safe. Final tip: if you’ve got a bullet vibrator and you want to explore some of the best ways to use it, make sure you’ve got it fully charged (or with fresh batteries) before you begin. It’s fun, and time flies, and nothing’s worse than having a sex toy die on you when you’re a bare three seconds from climax. Source

I got a request to shed some light on sexing in the community, and so I decided to start the #BasicTips series. This week, I will be posting videos on Oral sex. Please feel free to post videos too. First, let's learn about the anatomy of the Vulva, commonly called the V-zone.

Five years ago, the Nigerian government signed the Same Sex Marriage Prohibition Act, essentially banning gay relationships. Activists say the law has worsened discrimination against sexual minorities in the highly religious country. They also claim there’s been a rise in instances of extortion and blackmail of the LGBTQI+ community by security forces. Half a decade after the law passed, our correspondent Mayeni Jones investigates what life is really like for Nigeria’s gay community. Source

Happy New Year ladies!

An old short film with a gay character played by a Nigerian seems to have a lesson for us all. It sort of reawakens and enforces the need to sometimes question some of our beliefs and values. The 2013 short film ‘Siri Oko Fo [Mending Fences]’ explored the life of an interracial gay couple living abroad. Nigerian filmmaker Ebbe Bassey was the Executive Director of the film and the producers are Josh Hetzler and Ed Ro. Starring in the film are Ebbe Bassey, Aminah James, Kola Ogundiran, and Ash Roeca. Other themes explored in the film are love, family bonds, same-sex parenting, and female genital mutilation in Nigeria. Also, the film made its debut at the 2008 Cannes International Film Festival in Nice, France and has gone on to screen at other festivals such as the Hollywood Black Film Festival (Los Angeles), Urban World Film Festival (New York), etc. In a country where so many people do not understand what it truly means to be gay, films such as this, are means through which people can learn and understand the struggles and realities of being gay and Nigerian. Source

Gesare Chife said she visited Eastern Nigeria for the first time and what struck her was the land left uncultivated, which is something unusual in Kenya. Source

A new web-series produced by super-star Nollywood actress and film producer, Uche Jombo, highlights issues relating to men pretending to be gay for financial gains. Many young Nigerian men, deceive gay men into believing that they are gay with an intention to rip them off. Most times things get very ugly for both parties, but more often, gay men are mostly blackmailed and extorted if they refuse to keep up. However, Jombo’s new series ‘Social Media Slay’ addresses and highlights the issue from a whole different and interesting perspective with an exciting twist. The reality/drama series is based around real-life experiences of people living fake on the internet. The film was released under Jumbo’s film company Uche Jombo Studios and is exclusively available on Nvivo TV, a new Nigerian online free video streaming platform. Episode 3 of the series is a must-watch, especially for those thinking about deceiving gay people for financial gains. This is particularly exciting as we are beginning to witness an era where queer issues are being objectively addressed in the Nigerian mainstream media. To watch the film, click HERE. Source

Hey girls, as the name suggests, mention things you have never done.

Given the growing acceptance of LGBTQ people, some might question the continued relevance of National Coming Out Day. But a new survey conducted by Queerty’s sister site, LGBTQ Nation in conjunction with the polling firm SurveyMonkey, show’s strong support for the celebration of the annual equality awareness raising day. And it’s easy to see why: Only 40% of respondents said they feel comfortable holding hands with their significant other in public, and 45% said they feel as though they are treated differently because of their sexuality or gender identity since Trump took office. Even worse, 78% reported that their employer was not doing enough to support their LGBTQ employees. Clearly, the road to freedom is long. Related: 15 celebrities who came out in 2017 (so far) Of the nearly 600 people who participated in the survey, 86% said they were familiar with National Coming Out Day, and 80% said they find “coming out” publicly as LGBTQ necessary. The survey also unearthed three main reasons people chose to come out: 74% said they just wanted to be open 13% said they were encouraged by family and friends 9% said they did so after being outed And they are coming out in droves. While 7% of respondents said they still have “no plans” to come out to anyone, the vast majority are coming out to friends (86%), family (75%), people you date (64%), coworkers (62%) and their boss (47%). Despite how far we have to go toward full social and legal equality, in general respondents reported feeling optimistic about the future, despite the political setbacks under President Trump. 87% say that in 10 years, LGBTQ people will be more fully accepted, and almost nobody thinks “outing” someone is acceptable (4%). This survey of nearly 600 respondents of the LGBTQ community was sourced by a partnership between LGBTQ Nation’s online platforms and the SurveyMonkey Audience panel. Source

In an exclusive interview, Sky's special correspondent Alex Crawford talks to the president of Zambia about the US ambassador's remarks on a gay couple who have been imprisoned and the row that has sparked between the two countries.

Hello Ladies, Hawken's thought on the what's on your mind thread has inspired this post. The worst part of abusive relationships is the conspiracy of silence. The abused for some unknown reason (often disguised as love) refuses to come out of the abusive situation. So here is my question: If a friend confided in you about recurring incidences of abuse in her relationship and has told you to keep quiet about it but she keeps hurting and continues with this relationship, what would you do?

What are your thoughts about the book, the interviews... If you aren't sure about what I'm referring to, check this out: ...and How does it make you feel?

I stumbled on this quote online, and decided to share with the group. What is your take on being socially awkward/introverted.

Mursi Haynes knows a thing or two about hard work. After serving in the United States Air Force for five years, she deejayed and freelanced in TV production for a number of years before finally deciding to pursue a more entrepreneurial role as a content creator. But it's only been within the last year that Mursi has developed and catapulted her Talent Management career, where she consults, represents, pitches, negotiates, schedules and books. That's a lot of talking, networking, and showing face. "When I first took on this position, more of my day consisted of handling bookings, scheduling, and so forth," Mursi explained. "Shortly after, I began pitching my client to brands, negotiating deals, attending industry events and creative shoots." As a result, Mursi realized her work wardrobe didn't reflect her new, more professional title. "My professional goal is to get out of my comfort zone, and attend more in-person meetings and events in order to expand my network. I want to shake more hands versus striking keys. In my opinion, it's a much more effective way of connecting with people." While Mursi recognizes the need for a wardrobe update, she's always had a passion for style and a very clear-cut view of her aesthetic. "One thing that has never changed is my love for a more androgynous style," Mursi explained. While she defines her general style as edgy, casual, and sometimes street, her goal for this season is to keep elements of edginess, yet elevate her look professionally. "It's already a challenge for me as a woman, black, and queer to walk into a room and demand fair compensation for my client's time and talent," Mursi said. "It's important for me to feel and look great when I'm discussing money." These neutral suits from the Lauren Ralph Lauren Fall 2019 collection are perfect for when Mursi is in a more client-facing day. "I can see myself wearing these neutral-patterned tailored suits to business meetings, especially with brand reps, accompanying my clients on campaign shoots, or daytime industry events," she said. Plus, a head-to-toe monochromatic look is a power move no one can ignore. Mursi definitely has strong opinions about style, but she admits she's not great at keeping up with trends. Specifically, she said, "I am looking to incorporate more color, both casually and professionally." For those dressier evening events, a royal purple corduroy blazer and trouser set is a great way to make a statement while maintaining her unique aesthetic. In addition, she can upgrade loafers by looking for a luxe fabric like velvet or croc-effect. "This outfit would have been perfect for two events I attended recently," Mursi said. "One was a cocktail party for a product launch and the other for a new brand to market. I can absolutely step out in this suit for similar upcoming events." The key for Mursi's new elevated style is simple outfit formulas that are easy to follow. "My partner picks on me all the time because I take forever to get ready," she said. "I spend so much time trying to put pieces together, I sometimes get frustrated." Mursi admits to wearing jeans with a t-shirt or collared shirt and sneakers most days, maybe throwing on a blazer if the weather is cooler. Luckily, she can take that same outfit formula and elevate it with a few tailored pieces. A fitted trouser and wool-blend blazer will provide that same level of comfort, but with a professional, unique twist. "It's all about finding that balance between masculine and feminine when shopping as this is a reflection of my individuality," Mursi said. Source

This is such a sensitive topic and so, I'll treat it as such.... I was left with a question in my head and I honestly couldn't pick a side. I was listening to someone who was recounting the tale of her neighbours who have kids but who are unable to provide for them and as a result, the oldest, a 13 year old, is having to work... (I'll stop here to spare your eyes some tears). So here is the question I put to myself: Is it really fair to say that the poor should not have children (until such a time that they can adequately provide for them)? what are your thoughts?.

There’s no nudity or funny business in it, but that’s not stopping numerous airlines censoring the key hook-up scene in Olivia Wilde’s Booksmart. Comfortably one of the best films of the year is Olivia Wilde’s directorial debut, Booksmart. If you’ve not had the pleasure yet, just track down a copy. It’s on DVD and digital download in the UK – you’ll need to import from Australia or the US if you want a Blu-ray – and it’s very much worth the effort. In a bizarre and troubling piece of censorship though, it turns out that some major airlines have chopped the film for its in-flight entertainment system. It’s been reported on Twitter by an assortment of its users that apparently Delta, Etihad and Emirates have shown a version that excludes the film’s lesbian hook-up scene. The whole scene. She added further in the conversation chain that a different movie had a heterosexual hookup scene left entirely in tact. This has now come to the attention of Olivia Wilde too, and as she pointed out, there’s no nudity in the scene. There’s nothing troubling about it at all, in fact, and compared to other films that airlines show relatively untampered, sadly it looks like the fact that it’s a hook up scene between two women that’s the heart of the problem. The airlines concerned haven’t yet commented. At the very least, we can but hope that the publicity this generates will encourage more people to see out one of the best films of 2019. But still: sheesh. Source

The award-winning U.K.-based professional Nigerian gay model and 2016 winner of ‘Mr. Ideal Nigeria Earth’ and the first runner-up of ‘Mr. Africa International’ has released a Q&A video on YouTube responding to some questions he’s been asked since he accepted himself as gay. In the video, Gede who was closeted throughout his stay in Nigeria until he left for the UK in 2017, said dating, and marrying a woman was fun. Just like many gay men who battle with their sexuality, Gede who is now dating a man said he thought that marrying a woman would turn him straight. “Being married was fun. The first year when we were dating and all that was fun. I was really in love and I am sure she was in love with me – I hope. At that point, I thought I had conquered this gay side of me.” He said. Gede answered many other interesting questions about his life and relationship with his ex-wife and kids. Watch the full video below. Source

Gay people are mostly misunderstood and seen in more negative ways, a lot of the things people believe about LGBTIQ+ people are complete lies based entirely on stereotypes. But what many do not know is that there are so many fantastic and awesome things about LGBTIQ+ people. Read below 5 things that people do not know about gay people. 1. THEY ARE INFLUENTIAL Most gay people might not like the sort of attention their sexuality brings. But the truth is; no one can decide how people react to their personality. Gay people are like stars and celebrities. They command so much attention wherever they are spotted. This is because like stars, they are meant to shine and influence. 2. THEY ARE FABULOUS. Gay people are special. They have an exceptional sense of humor, class, and style. They are mostly smart and destined for greatness. No wonder people can’t stop obsessing and talking about them. This is because no one can ignore or resist greatness and potentials when they see it. 3. THEY ARE CREATIVE Difference isn’t always a bad thing. Yes, gay people are like everyone else in the sense that they want the same things that every other person wants. But the uniqueness of their sexuality separates them from the crowd. This unique quality allows gay people to see things differently, and this is why they are intensely creative. 4. THEY ARE COMPASSIONATE Because gay people know exactly how it feels to be rejected and discriminated against, they are more sympathetic to other vulnerable groups. They mostly go out of their way to ensure that people are treated fairly. No wonder a lot of them are very passionate about social justice. 5. THEY ARE LOVEABLE Most people who are homophobic are those who do not have a personal relationship with a gay person. Their judgments and bias are mostly based on negative stereotypes and ignorance about gay issues. Those who are close to gay people will tell you that they are the most lovable, disciplined, and focused people you will ever know and meet. Source