Is a past Lesbian Relationship worth taking back, after Pain and Sorrow?

[chocolat]

Got a call, plus an email from a dear friend asking for some lesbian relationship advice. Following her email is another email which she received from her last girlfriend who dumped her at a time when she needed her the most.My Friend has now moved on with her life but wanted to make sure if she is making the right decision — that of not taking her girlfriend back. Did she make the right decision? She feels however that her girlfriend deserves a second chance.

 

Email from my friend

 

My girlfriend of over two years wants to have me back. She dumped me early this year after I lost my job. It was very painful for me. It was at that time when I needed her the most, at least for emotional support. I now have moved on with my life. Is it right to take her back after what she did to me? How do I let go of someone I still care?

 

A copy of the email from the EX girlfriend

 

 

Hello how are you?

 

I called you twice just now but you did not answer the phone. Guess you were busy. I am spending my last night in Georgia now and will return to Chicago tomorrow late afternoon.

I wanted to talk to you because I want to let you know where I stand. I drove 12 hours back and forth to see you because I was emotional and desperate to have you back. It was an emotional impulsive act. I wanted to apologize for all the hurt and pain that I had caused you in the past and I wanted to be sincere about how sorry I am. I wanted to do that in person rather than a phonecall. And I apologize for taking up your time on that day as I knew you were busy.

 

 

You are a good person and I had done the worst thing to you by breaking up with you. But since then, I had changed.

 

 

So what I am trying to say is that I don’t want to beg and plead for us to get back together. I don’t want to guess if you will change your mind. I don’t want to repeat over and over again just to convince you to get back together with me. I don’t want to call and start crying. I know we love and care for each other and that’s why I wanted for us to try again. If you don’t want to get back together because you cannot trust me anymore based on my past behavior and decisions, that is fine with me. I cannot change my mistakes because it was already in the past. I regret them but I cannot change them. I am not perfect and I did make mistakes and bad decisions in the past. And I am sure I will continue to make mistakes in the future because I am only human. I am not afraid to fall because I want and like to build my emotional and mental muscles with each fall.

 

 

So this is basically where I stand right now. It is best for me to say all these to you in an email. I don’t want to keep calling you. I am too old to go around in emotional circles and cycles. And I certainly don’t want to put myself in a compromising position. So whatever you decide, that is fine with me. I love you and care about you.

All the best to you.

 

Share Your Thoughts or Opinions

 

We appreciate your comments.Your comment will help my friend make a right decision.

[chocolat]

I adviced her not to take her back. If she wasnt there when shes down,i will not take her back when am up period.

[moresko]

Depends on the person, its a personal decision. Since I don't know everything that happened during that relationship, I would tell the person to weigh the pros and cons of getting involved with her ex again. Trust is always earned never given, and if you can't trust someone again you shouldn't be in a relationship with them.

[FlyJ]

I adviced her not to take her back. If she wasnt there when shes down,i will not take her back when am up period.

 

I kinda agree with you on this. It is a painful reason to break up with someone because they lost their job; however, it depends on what happened before she lost her job. It is a hard situation but if she is up to giving her a second chance, she can go ahead and see how it goes.Very tricky advising someone when it comes to matters of the heart. She just needs to tread with caution this time around.

[Michelle]

On 9/10/2013 at 4:49 PM, chocolat said:

dumped her at a time when she needed her the most.

This would disqualify her from receiving any consideration from me.