Things to Note About Domestic Abuse

[kimi]

As a result of the stay-at-home directives issued by various governments all around the world, several countries have seen a rise in domestic abuse cases.

One recent definition of domestic abuse caught my ears. It stood out for me because it goes beyond the traditional definition of domestic abuse. Here it is: when you feel the need to alter your behaviour out of fear that your partner may cause you harm -BBC

In any case, I thought to share an excerpt from an article I happened to stumble upon. Please be safe in there.

Warning Signs of Domestic Violence

It’s not always easy to tell at the beginning of a relationship if it will become abusive.

In fact, many abusive partners may seem absolutely perfectin the early stages of a relationship. Possessive and controlling behaviors don’t always appear overnight, but rather emerge and intensify as the relationship grows.

Domestic violence doesn’t look the same in every relationship because every relationship is different. But one thing most abusive relationships have in common is that the abusive partner does many different kinds of things to have more power and control over their partner.

Some of the signs of an abusive relationship include a partner who:

• Tells you that you can never do anything right
• Shows extreme jealousy of your friends and time spent away
• Keeps you or discourages you from seeing friends or family members
• Insults, demeans or shames you with put-downs
• Controls every penny spent in the household
• Takes your money or refuses to give you money for necessary expenses
• Looks at you or acts in ways that scare you
• Controls who you see, where you go, or what you do
• Prevents you from making your own decisions
• Tells you that you are a bad parent or threatens to harm or take away your children
• Prevents you from working or attending school
• Destroys your property or threatens to hurt or kill your pets
• Intimidates you with guns, knives or other weapons
• Pressures you to have sex when you don’t want to or do things sexually you’re not comfortable with
• Pressures you to use drugs or alcohol

To read the full article: Source

[Chilee]

14 hours ago, kimi said:

when you feel the need to alter your behaviour out of fear that your partner may cause you harm -BBC

Never thought of it like this but it does make sense👌🏾

[kimi]

3 minutes ago, Chilee said:

Never thought of it like this but it does make sense👌🏾

Yep. Simple yet profound and true

[Txunamy]

Thank Goodness I have never been in such situation.. Stuff like this scare me easily. 

[Hawken]

This just made me very angry because I just remembered that every other 2 weeks , the guy besides my apartment threatens his wife with divorce and taking full custody of their kids.

The latest fight they had, had him telling his son "your mother is a bad woman. I'm just telling you this because you are a man. Your mother is wicked." Etc etc etc. Mind you, said child is at most 4 years old.

And this fight was because he was knocking at the gate and it took her a minute to go open it. At 12/1am.

[kimi]

18 minutes ago, Hawken said:

This just made me very angry because I just remembered that every other 2 weeks , the guy besides my apartment threatens his wife with divorce and taking full custody of their kids.

The latest fight they had, had him telling his son "your mother is a bad woman. I'm just telling you this because you are a man. Your mother is wicked." Etc etc etc. Mind you, said child is at most 4 years old.

And this fight was because he was knocking at the gate and it took her a minute to go open it. At 12/1am.

Sighs.... 

[Txunamy]

2 hours ago, Hawken said:

This just made me very angry because I just remembered that every other 2 weeks , the guy besides my apartment threatens his wife with divorce and taking full custody of their kids.

The latest fight they had, had him telling his son "your mother is a bad woman. I'm just telling you this because you are a man. Your mother is wicked." Etc etc etc. Mind you, said child is at most 4 years old.

And this fight was because he was knocking at the gate and it took her a minute to go open it. At 12/1am.

Its a shame she is still with him. And of course, like they always say 'I'm still with him because of my kids". 

[Hawken]

3 hours ago, Txunamy said:

Its a shame she is still with him. And of course, like they always say 'I'm still with him because of my kids". 

Plus she doesn't work ☹️☹️

[kimi]

8 minutes ago, Hawken said:

Plus she doesn't work ☹️☹️

Why women continue to do this to themselves saddens me. Most times, the abuser ensures they stay 100% dependent and even refuse them to run a business on the side. 

[Mimy]

9 hours ago, kimi said:

Why women continue to do this to themselves saddens me. Most times, the abuser ensures they stay 100% dependent and even refuse them to run a business on the side. 

This is the reality of most Northern women. They endure all the shit thrown at them. 

[Hawken]

13 hours ago, kimi said:

Why women continue to do this to themselves saddens me. Most times, the abuser ensures they stay 100% dependent and even refuse them to run a business on the side. 

Yep. It's a very intentional and effective means of control.

[Hawken]

13 hours ago, kimi said:

Why women continue to do this to themselves saddens me. Most times, the abuser ensures they stay 100% dependent and even refuse them to run a business on the side. 

Yep. It's a very intentional and effective means of control.